I am watching her, just as she is watching me. To some extent it hurts to see her like this but I also find it repulsive - because she has done this to her own self. I do not know what she is expecting; perhaps she would like a frenzied emotive greeting completed with tears and smiles and bright grins. Perhaps she would like a simple hello, an apology or forgiveness. It occurs to me that I've never truly known what she's expected of me. After all she was here for naught but a few weeks and it was in that time and in that time only in which I pledged my allegiance to her forever. She is frozen after my rather cold greeting and I wonder if I should've said something a little more happy.
My citrine-eyed brother makes his appearance then, just as I'd expected him to - for what wolf was more affected by the queen's absence than he? - and greets me with affection. I wonder if it's being exaggerated for our hostile benefit, because surely his fury is just as white-hot as mine. I cannot help but smile and press my nose to his in a brotherly embrace in response, but then turn when Satowra takes two steps back as though recoiling from our combined anger. My smile sours on my lips and twists into something bitter; for isn't that what she does always? Step away from the inner turmoil, the eye of the storm, and leave those caught within it to fend for themselves? At least that is how I interpret it.
The former queen grasps those last tattered shreds of an alpha's persona which I see must still linger within her, and draws herself up defiantly. Her audacious words stun me into silence momentarily before that silence grows thoughtful as I contemplate my next words. "Capable paws, indeed," I say softly, and then turn my teal gaze to meet hers in a brazen act.
"Do you expect these glares and walls, this space we've put in between you is to spite you, Satowra? Have you not learned that we are not that way? You must understand that we loved you." I pause, and then take a deep breath. I remember how Satowra had struck me as a great orator and then draw up that strength and pour it into my words.
"When I came to Bright Moon, I was broken. You remember, don't you? Soul had been my moon and my stars and my sun and she'd left me, and I was fractured and thought I had nothing left within myself to carry on. There is a reason why I think of Bright Moon as a land of rebirth," I begin. "I did not run, however. I let them all in. I allowed them to help me and look at me now!" I laugh although there is no mirth within its resonating waves. "I am the beta of a flourishing pack. I have wolves I care for around me. My brothers - Tamlin, Rio - my sisters. I have all that I'd hoped for and more, and I've gained back everything I lost the moment I stepped out of Casteon and out of Soul's heart." Now, now I raise my tail and lift my chin a fraction. "But you. You ran, Satowra. I am not aware of the reason, for it seems to be far too large to ever be put into words, but you left us. You did not even tell us when you were leaving or even a vague reason as to why. That was a cowards move, and now you pay. By inflicting exile upon yourself, you've only hurt yourself more, and you've hurt your - or Tamlin's - pack with it. You have nothing now, because of it," I spit, before calming myself down and letting my bristled hackles fall. "You should have let us heal you, queen. You should've let us heal you, as you once healed us."