Have you ever had a nightmare that was still around when you opened your eyes? I followed my father and my siblings out of Trenus, looking over my shoulder for my mom the entire time. Zildjian had gone after her, but I couldn't stop, my heart demanded that I did, but the gods simply wouldn't allow it. How could this be happening? How could Fate be so angry at my family that they would try to shatter us this way? I stayed with the Stargazer and the rest of my family, and as we left Trenus, I looked back over my shoulder in time to see my silver knight run out. I felt the dread in my heart as I caught his face, the expression there, like he had just witnessed the worst tragedy ever, despite the flaming stars crashing down on Trenus. I had nightmares for the first year, seeing my mother tried by fire, watching her perish in a fiery tomb with the unlucky ones of my siblings. During these nights I woke up crying silently, instinctively reaching out for Zildjian. He helped me so much during this time, I owed him so much, and yet I feared I would never get to pay it back.
I wish that we had been able to have our ceremony, and I wished like hell my mother would have been there with us. Thinking of her still stung my heart and burned my soul. We wandered for the longest time, two years flying by as my family moved from place to place. Every now and then I would go ahead and see if Moladion was safe again, from a distance. I stood on the tops of mountains, watching the hellfire wash Moladion new. At first, the gaping hole in the ground that had once been my home had hurt and I had cried. But over time I watched the vegetation grow with my curiosity. What was this new land that took shape before my eyes? The scar began to fill with beauty, even the place where Remora Plains had been got a dusting of short green lichen and moss. I too had grown, filling out to become an ethereal dancer. I held all of the grace and tact as my mother, but if one crossed me I had the temper of my father. I made sure that the younger ones were safe, as Zildjian made sure I was safe. He filled out as well, growing taller than even my father, more muscular before my eyes. Loner life had made him strong, and me more beautiful.
Tonight we strolled on the ridge of the eastern side of the crater, far away from Heyel and the rest of my family. I looked over the edge of the crater, noting the sheer drop to the bottom where there were the rivers went west. The grasses here were short and spiky, but I could appreciate the way the gods sculpted the face of Moladion. Her biomes vastly different from one another as night is from day. I find I look up more often, studying the skies and making sure this isn't a ploy by Fate. I have watched my family mourn my mother and the little ones we lost. I saw the ghosts of the past rush up to haunt my father as his face morphed into that expression of ultimate grief. It broke my heart to watch him cry, I have never seen a tear cloud his eyes before, and to know he shed them over my mother made my heart ache and throat close. So much had been taken from us, so much had been given back. I think this was a warning to my family, that we should not hold our heads up so high, that we should not compare ourselves to the gods and goddesses.
I press close to my imprint, loving the feel of his silver-barred fur against mine. Even I had felt the slack in the bond we shared, but neither of us dared to part from the other. Love, respect, fear, and Fate all demanded we remain close. He speaks, my ears tilting to catch the lilt of his voice. "And I you, amo, I do not know what I would have done had I lost you." I would have been lost forever without my rock. Father calls him this to be mean, the rock, I find the term steadying. I love this wolf, and I will for all of my life. I reach up and brush a soft kiss against his nose. I was happy we found each other before my father had time to drive me into the Art. My mother's most precious gift to me was finding him, betrothing me to him. I will be forever thankful to her, and I did wonder from time to time if she had know Fate's design. I wonder why she didn't use this knowledge when the stars fell. Perhaps she did, perhaps she watches now and is proud. I would like to hope so, I am proud of us. My gaze is bright as it meets the pale lavender of Zildjian's.
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