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I can tell that she doesn't want to be mad. She seems hesitant at every turn but I can read doubt under the surface. Knowing Laila, she's probably blaming herself and that couldn't be farthest from the truth. There's nothing about her that I don't love. Her fur, her eyes, her nose, her paws, even her crooked tail holds my deepest affection. She seems thoughtful. I can tell that she has a past and it's probably not a very bright one, judging by her tail, but who does? Who can say that their past is all bright and sunshiney? Her words sting. I know that I have failed her. I wasn't there when she needed me. She talks of sacrifices and I know that I haven't sacrificed anything for her. I grow scared. Will she ask me to give up Belinda? Will that be my sacrifice? I am speechless, staring at her, hesitant. Finally she tells me that she forgives me and it feels like my whole world is on fire, but a pleasant fire, a healing fire. My heart feels whole again to know that her feelings for me haven't changed and I barely listen to the rest of it. I shake my head. I have no need to forgive you, Laila. You did nothing wrong. I did and you were right to be mad at me for it. I promise I won't do it again. I won't leave you. I look into her eyes, wanting her to know that I mean it. She had every right to be angry with me. I left her and the children alone during the worst time, the time when they needed me most. I was a failure as a father and as an imprint. I don't want to fail her again, ever. When she talks about being scared, I can't help myself. I lean toward her, wrapping my neck around her, pulling her close. Shh, it's okay, Laila. You're not alone, not anymore. I'm here. I'll be here. My place is with you. And I know that it's true with every fiber of my being. I know that here is where I belong, where my soul belongs. |