<font color=#000000 face=times size=2> <font style="text-transform:lowercase"> I know that time has numbered my days</font></font>

I know that time has numbered my days
IP: 82.19.140.112
Posted on October 6, 2013 at 11:35:03 PM by a r t h u r

How old had they been when she had vanished? Arthur didn�t think that any of them had even reached twenty. He didn�t think Ciara had been there when Gawain had been born, let alone Tristan. She had not been there as he had tried to navigate his people safely through one disaster after another, or when his world had been torn apart. She would have no idea about Lilith�s decline in mental health, nor about the ice that had claimed the life of his eldest son. He would have to tell her all of it, how Lilith had finally broken and left him alone to raise their only remaining child, who had suddenly found himself thrust towards a destiny that had not originally been his. It was hard enough to think it, let alone explain it, and Arthur couldn�t find the words to even start. He smiled instead, a little sadly, his grey eyes pooling with regret and pain, his usual guard lowered for his friend. �It feels like a lifetime,� he confessed, taking in the changed eyes and altered hair silently and without comment. And it did.

The King rose to his feet, removing his weight from the mattress and crossed the room to his wardrobe. Pulling open the door, he moved his own trousers and tunics out of the way until he found one of the dresses that still hung there. He had never had the heart to remove them. The purple silk slipped through his fingers as he laid it out on the bed and he gave Ciara an encouraging smile, before turning his back in order to give her some privacy. He was not the same person he had been, this was not the Arthur who had kissed Ciara in a stable, nor the one who had found her crying on a beach. Love had been cruel to him in his first lifetime, but he had discovered a stark difference between discovering that someone you loved didn�t love you back, and knowing that someone who loved you had chosen to leave you and everything you had built together. It was a different kind of betrayal. Sometimes he could remember his time with Lilith with joy, but sometimes he felt an intense sadness, and at other moments he would find himself filled with anger. Sometimes it was for himself, but mostly it was for Tristan. He had needed his mother far more than Arthur had needed his wife. That had always been his problem. He loved people, but he rarely felt like he needed them in order for his world to be complete. The king could settle for less than he desired...but he wanted the best for his child.

�Where have you been?� he asked Ciara gently, dragging himself away from his thoughts. He was eager to stem the flood of memories that her appearance had generated, �I worried for you.� The longer the conversation went on, sooner the king knew that he would hear the words that would strain his heart, so where�s Lilith? He wish he knew. Of all the things in the world that were a mystery to him, that was one of the few that kept him from sleep at night.

_{photography and editing by merlin}

Replies:

where there is desire there is gonna be a flame - By c i a r a October 7, 2013 at 02:24:34 AM

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