If she were perfectly honest, Thoth was just as perplexing as Alistair. Alethea watched him grapple with her question, giving it more consideration than she had expected, and then pronouncing his verdict with all the surety of a judge. She nodded mutely. Was that what she was doing – letting her pain define her? The little lady did not think she had been treating anyone uncivilly since...that day, but she hadn’t been treating many people at all. Her experience had certainly begun to define her appearance, at the very least. Perhaps Thoth was right...though she wasn’t sure that it was her place to judge someone that did not live by such an edict.
“I’m sorry,” she said softly, feeling her own sadness flare afresh. “I lost someone, too. It was my fault,” she continued absently, parroting a thought that had become her mantra. Maybe Thoth’s forgetfulness had killed the snake, or maybe not, but Alethea’s insistence on visiting the cove had definitely put her guard in harm’s way. Her lip quivered, stilled. She was out of tears. Out of tears, and virtue, and goodness. Her arms folded over her stomach.
Alistair’s yelp drew her eye too quickly for her to notice Thoth’s glare. She shuffled over to him automatically, gracelessly, and hovered over the healer’s shoulder, watching. Her eyes were wide with pain and concern. “Is there anything I can do?” she asked generally, voicing her helplessness without any real expectation of a reply. But the woman did answer, tight-lipped: “You can give him space, m’lady. If you’re in need of something to do, go arrange for some clothes for the boy, and have someone draw him a bath.” Alethea nodded, grateful. It was unusual for someone who worked at the castle to give her orders, but she had a reputation for gentleness and had come to think of all the castle’s residents as family. Her eyes sought Alistair’s, smiling encouragingly, and she turned to carry out the request.
Anything was better than sitting in her room today, dwelling on what had happened and turning the memory over and over, reliving it from every angle.
As she stepped through the door, she paused, offering Thoth the same smile she had given Alistair. “It was nice to meet you, Thoth. I’m sorry it couldn’t be under happier circumstances.” And then she was gone, hurrying down the hall with her wolf on her heels.
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