A flicker, my ear flickering in the very same direction it leaves to, and it seems that, whatever or whomever was watching me so closely no longer stuck quite close to the frame of woods in which I stood. Still, my limbs shivered and shook with that strange desire just to move. I begin to think, there's a much less desirable reason to my instincts, as though someone's lingering in wait, watching me as though to pounce and... I hesitate to let my mind wander there, but it does seem about appropriate. Ears whirl behind me, and my whole body shivers. Don't attack, Estelle, don't attack. They've done nothing to you yet. You have no reason to be defensive. There are times that I just have to up and tell myself things like this to calm the urges that pop up in my head. Calm down, Estelle. Calm down.
Breathing in and out, trying to feel as much calm as possible despite any impending doom feelings, something else catches my attention and makes my tail wave in a sort of anticipation. Strange, really, for my mate... was the last one to make me feel such anticipation... that's a story for another time, though, isn't it? All of it is, despite how much I still miss him when I let myself think about it. There are things that even the most 'open' will likely still hide from themselves. Still, if asked... perhaps I'd be willing to open up if I felt... like I could trust in the listeners, for it would be opening up my own old wounds to the new air.
Who are you supposed to be, hmm?
The words entering my ears cause my forcibly paused muscles to relent and move again, facing the cause of the sound and speaking as he continues in tones so smooth that even that shivery need to move from before pales in his presence. Blinking moonlit eyes at the confident violets set before me, it truly is as though everything I was thinking before, everything I was feeling... dissipated for the moment. There's only he, and myself. How did I not let myself notice his approach in the midst of calming what are now revealed to have been my own emotions? Yet, it feels almost as though I shouldn't care more. At what point did it go from feeling angst riding in my bones to feeling calmed? He's sitting, however, so I follow suit, dropping my form to the ground and sitting level with this curious and handsome vir optimus.
And, oh, but my eyes follow after his.
"I am the peace of a generation plagued by an aching world... or, at least, that was always my intention. I don't know any longer who I should be... merely who I am."
The words just flow out from me, though silence has always been as a second skin to me, keeping the true things I think and feel beyond a veil of my own making. It's as though something in me already desires to trust this wolf, more than merely a little. Here's hoping it doesn't backfire on me.
"As far as the woods..." Ear twitches. "I was being watched. Yet, I'm sure I know naught of any herein enough to be watched of them."
Misty pearls seek the orchid depths of his eyes once more, and it's as though I want nothing more than to send him just a little glimpse of myself. Yet, will I yet, I know not. I know not what he will see in my eyes, nor his intentions, nor even if this desire to trust him will come back to hurt me in the end. There it is, though, laid out with the quiet whisper of the wind across my oddly warmed cheek.
"Estelle."
The word is barely more than mouthed from my lips, yet in it all, is the singular word that has been set to describe my whole life in a nutshell. My name. Just as mine leaves my lips, however, in that same manner and tone I speak the implied next question.
"You?"
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estelle · 11 years · angel · truly alone · lhx
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