She would never turn away from him; never simply vanish because he faced that which no one else did. She wasn’t sure of love, wasn’t sure how to proceed and feel and express such emotion. Emotionally she was largely undeveloped; there wasn’t much of a chance for it while on the run every night and day. No family to teach her how to love or a pack to show her she was supposed to act, Church got the job of figuring all of it out for herself. As she stared in to the crystal blue eyes of her soul she felt that wrench in her heart and knew beyond a doubt at that moment she loved him. No doubt her eyes shimmered with tears that longed to be shed but she blinked them back, pain demanded to be felt but now was not the time. Caught in this cliché of a love triangle she would find time to herself to sort it all out. Her Sun and Moon deserved more than just part of her heart and she needed to learn, somehow, to give all of herself to one person. Yet at this very moment she wasn’t sure who.

As she had before she pushed down the emotions that threatened to destroy the pure and simple joy of the moment she found herself in; saved for another time when finding out what exactly all this meant was much more imperative. Wrapped in the warm glow of his body in this private space she forced herself back to the here and now, determined to enjoy this as long as she could before getting back to reality and actually dealing with her issues.

They were silent for a long time after her mumbled words hung heavy in the air until the gently change in his posture wrapped her closer to him, nestled in the warmth of his platinum fur and she breathed a sigh of relief. She didn’t need to see his face, didn’t need to ask how he felt, she couldn’t simply feel it in the perfect way he melted around her to fit like a glove. Her eyes close and she allows herself to revel in this feeling, here hidden away from the world and prying eyes when souls can be bared and lives knitted together in silence. His soft words finally brought her fully back to him, the words so laced with a passion she hadn’t yet experienced before. She half nods and half nuzzles his neck as the words, unable to keep the smile from playing on her features despite the serious nature of their conversation.

As he pulls away however it vanishes, missing the warmth and feel of him in an instant yet she calms almost immediately at his words. She smiles more directly at him this time, the slight curve of her lips not quite reaching her eyes as she reflects over a past she had long since attempted to forget, but if ever she were going to tell another of it now would be the time. Lowering her tawny form to the ground she sighs into her small paws, steeling herself as she prepared to tell a tale she had never told before. “I come from a place far away from here. At this point I’m not sure even my wandering feet could find their way back there, not that I hope to ever return,” she began, a sad kind of bitterness in her voice. “There were always the believers and the non-believers and while there is tale of a time when it didn’t quite matter which you were that had long since vanished when I came along. In the time between a war had sprung up at the command of the believers, ordained by God they called it,” she almost spit the name, no fondness for a deity that would condone such or those who would carry out such deeds in his name.

“It had carried on for years by my time, the determination of the believers to convert all to their cause while it seemed the others simply sought freedom from the regulations believing seemed to be. Whatever the cause, the result was always the piling up of bodies on both sides. When I finally entered the world elders had come in place with a draft to force younger wolves in to the ranks, though I was too young at the time I was still taught about invisible wars that waged in spiritual places and the need for all to believe if the darkness was ever to be vanquished, angels and demons, God and Satan, wars as old as time itself. Yet as my age drew closer to that of the draft I found I lacked the conviction that what we did was right…that others and even myself should be forced to believe in this cause. I begged my parents to take me away, to keep me safe and not send me off to never return for the belief of a greater good.” Her voice trembled slightly at the memory, of the gripping fear that only seemed to grow with each passing day. A fear she vowed never to subject herself to again. “They told me I should be grateful for the opportunity to devote myself to such a cause, that serving would be an honor and I should be ashamed at my own lack of faith,” her tone turned darker, the feeling of betrayal by her own blood somehow still stinging years later. “I ran away that very night, fleeing for a life I feared being forced to live, cursed by a lack of faith in something I didn’t choose.”

Her head shook sadly, once more fighting back tears that she had never allowed herself to shed. Weakness wasn’t a thing she had ever been able to afford. Shakily she exhaled slowly, trying to recenter herself before turning her sea-green eyes back to him. “I’ve never seen demons or angels or gods, but I know the things they can bring a person to. Whatever is inside of you, causing you this pain, I pray to whatever gods don’t demand such high prices of our souls that I am the one who can heal you of it. No one deserves to live a life they did not choose,” she finishes quietly, the steely strength and conviction of her words burning in her face. Perhaps the unbeliever had finally found something to put her faith and hope in.