I do not know how I am supposed to feel. Part of me feels guilty for being gone for so long, but I was living with my Savior and helping her care for her young. It was the least I could do. I mean I wasn’t sure what else I could do for her since she saved me from that charred one red-eye wolf. I am not sure with what has gone on within Moladion. I am unaware that Heyel had died. I am unaware that Isola and Kane were dethroned and that their oldest son took the throne. I have been so out of place that perhaps I have not done what I should have done, but I honestly haven’t been myself lately. I have been feeling odd for a long time and I wasn’t quite sure what was wrong with me, but I think as long as I am back in the swamps then I should be okay. Silly me, to think that I would always be safe within the swamps. I had no idea that the male I had seen, that creeped me out and chased me, was lurking within the shadows and foliage. As I give out my call to my Alpha and my home I am completely caught off guard.
It isn’t like me, but I instantly release a savage snarl as I turn my head around. My black lips pull back to reveal my sharp teeth as I try to bite him to force him off me. But my body is not stable enough to allow me that movement to shove him off. His grip on me is too tight and I do not like how he sinks his teeth into the rough of my neck. I let out a sharp cry as I feel something that I know I shouldn’t and I try to move out from underneath him, but his grip on me is far too hard. I may not be able to get him off me, but I can at least try and release another call for help. Shouldn’t they be guarding the borders? Where was Avery? My call is painful and haunting as before, but with sincere urgency and need for help. When he is done with me I cannot help but turn my neck around and snap at him feeling my legs and body shake from the fear and sudden trauma. Quickly I lower my tail and clamp it close to me wishing I could erase the feeling I feel from where his weight was.
When I see the familiar shape of Starfall I let out a soft cry. He had come far too late to help me. I do not notice Aithne and her ebony and crimson face to the brown demon that had violated me and stole something that did not belong to him. Shakily I walk towards him my dial lowered my ears folded back as my once vibrant amethyst eyes held no shine. All it held was sadness and pain and absolutely fear. His inquiry causes me to shake my head as I quickly speak in soft whispers shakily.
“No...no....he...he...”
I manage to get close to him and I burry my face into his shoulder as my entire body shakes from the trauma. I cannot believe this has happened to me. I thought such things occur outside pack lands. I never thought that it could actually happen to me here, in my very home, and it makes me wonder if I will ever feel safe again. My Savior protected me and she was not pack. My pack had failed at their duties of guarding the borders, but I cannot think such ill things about them. It is when Aithne comes do I lift my face from Starfall’s shoulder as I look at her. I am ashamed that something like this just happened my mind cannot truly accept such a thing. I lower myself in her presence as I lean closer into Starfall wanting to feel protected, wanting to feel safe and not as vulnerable as I feel now. When Aithne touches my muzzle I cannot help, but whimper and cry, as I hold my muzzle to her own. Yet I know she does not like touch and so I tilt it away from her as I try to explain, but finding myself far too broken to finish.
“I...I was just coming home...I....he...he...r-rape-...I...”
I let out another cry as I turn my face away from Aithne as I burry my face into Starfall’s shoulder once more. What would Mother say to me? I should have fought him with everything I had, but...I was weak....I had my Father’s blood in me. All I can think about now is what am I going to do...because my mind and sanity is slowly unravelling...and I have no idea it is.