we’ll have to make it on our own
face all the pain and take it on
As Nephilim approached, both mare and stallion turned to greet him – Dances with a friendly nicker, and Sai with just her eyes, burning and bright, and the sorrow in them so much less than the first time they’d met. Because of him. She hung back as Dances moved forwards, and pressed his muzzle to his friend’s shoulder. A dusted ear flicked as the bay paint glanced back at her and seemed to hesitate. Sai reached out and gently brushed his patchwork neck. “Thank you, Dances With Wolves. Thank you for bringing me home.” Whatever unease he’d felt seemed to melt away, and he dipped his beautiful head, and backed up, turning neatly and heading over to the two fillies Nephilim had been grazing near.
Sai drifted to Nephilim’s side, her eyes lingering on Dances for a while, the two fillies, and beyond them – the rugged and majestic wilderness that she had just called ‘home’. Her heart was skipping in her chest, like the playful child she might have been. She could feel Nephilim’s gaze upon her, but could not bring herself to meet it just yet. All the things she’d thought of in her time alone – the things she wanted to tell him, they lay heavily on her tongue, so that she struggled to open her mouth, lest they all come tumbling out at once. A deep, steadying breath, and she risked a glance at him. Those golden eyes, warm and bright like the sun, stole what little breath was left in her.
He was even more beautiful than she’d remembered. Or perhaps he’d just grown a little more, in the time since they’d parted ways… Matured, become wiser, more settled. Maybe he knew who he was better than before. Or maybe, maybe it was just the traces of the thick winter coat he’d grown. Sai shifted, dipping her chin, internally chiding herself. All of a sudden, so quiet and shy, when she had been waiting for this moment since the day she’d first met this spotted golden boy. “Hey, yourself,” she managed finally, daring to glance at him again, well aware that it would be so easy for her to lose herself in his eyes. She remembered his kindness – kindness for a stranger, because that is what she was.
“Um, it’s really pretty here,” she continued, determined not to let her tongue fall silent again. A soft sound from the direction of the fillies drew her attention, and she saw Dances talking with them. “They are beautiful,” she said, lifting her head and turning her ears in their direction. Sai had yet to notice any others, but she was sure there were more here. After all, from what she’d seen of Nephilim, and the little she knew of Dances from the swim over, aside from the Bay, the stallions here surely made it what she’d said earlier - home.
“I’m sorry, Nephilim,” there – her tongue had become unstuck! She met his gaze now, held it for as long as he looked at her. “I’m sorry it took me so long. I just… I had to be sure…” Oh, she hadn’t thought of her mother nearly so often lately, and the realisation filled her with burning guilt. A stab of pain, and she winced, but forced herself not to turn away, even if her gaze did drop a moment. “I know now, I know my mother isn’t coming. And though it hurts…” She lifted her deep blue gaze, focused on his face. Much was unfamiliar about him, for they’d only met the once, but that meeting had made a lasting impression. Sai had remembered the lines of his face – thought she had seen them in the clouds once or twice, and he’d been there, in the stillness of the night, when her sorrow had threatened to drown her time and time again, she’d remembered him, standing there in the golden yellow light of their glade.
“I know that, come whatever may; monsters from my past, or dangers here on the islands… I will be okay. And I have you to thank for that.” No more glancing away, now, no more being unsure of herself. She was happy, and more than anything, she wanted Nephilim to be happy too. Having said all she needed to for the moment, she settled into a comfortable position, and after a moment’s thought, reached with her muzzle, huffing a soft breath against Nephilim’s cheek.
----
Dances watched the two for a second, turning away to rest his gaze on Mariael and just beyond her, there lay Maziel. “And what have you girls been up to lately, hmm? I’ve yet to explore the Bay much… But I can tell you of discoveries I’ve made on the Crossing, if you were interested.” As he spoke, he made his way closer to Maziel, so that she could contribute if she felt like, without needing to find her way.
because the only hope for me is you alone
DANCES & SAI. |