vaya

There was something about the river she liked. It had been here when she first woke in this world, unsure of what had come before and not really caring much either. Since then she had started to remember bits and pieces, none of which were very much fun at all. At first she had tried to deny the memories, claiming them false. That hadn’t worked very well. So now she convinced herself that they were true, but normal. Your parents killing you because you had no use was normal, obviously. Because if she told herself that was normal, it couldn’t hurt her anymore. And no one could give her pity, because she didn’t feel bad about it.

This strategy was working much better.

She was no longer afraid of the flashbacks now, it made life much easier. But she wasn’t having a flashback now. Now, she was crouched on a boulder beside the river, watching the fish in the sheltered pool the rock made. She had no urge to catch them, for she knew she would fail and then lose her entertainment. The heat of the sun was weaker now that fall had set in, but it was still enough to warm her chocolate coat. Light brown eyes were intent on the fish below her. Perhaps it was a gift to be so easily entertained. There was never a dull moment in the life of Joy.

Then again, maybe it was a curse.