Her small body sank to low to the ground, her tail tucked firmly between her legs. She was sure Malina did not understand. All her life she had been told she was a curse, a monster, that she had brought this all upon herself. Every day until death had gripped the woman who brought her into life. Pariah would never mean to do something, but that did not mean the cursed cloud did not follow her and reach out to those around her with its sickening tendrils. Whether she wished it or not, the happenings in the world around her, she was sure, were her fault. The rise and fall of Iromar had no place in her mind, simply her fear that she had nearly brought about the doom of another wolf when she had not meant to.
As Malina lowered herself to Pariah’s level the pup’s breathing returned to normal. Her ears pressed lightly again her neck, regretting her panic. Hesitantly she began her story. We were going to play on the ice. He and Mirage. He was friendly, and so was she. But then the snow started to fall really hard. We almost lost each other in it until we got to the crags. The crags had been her safety before, and had become so again. They sheltered her from the weather of the world and from the gazes of other wolves who would seek her. Deep in the caves, much like the ones in the mountains, was where she found herself at home. I left him there, I don’t know what happened or if he is still alive. She had to keep herself from hoping she had left him in time. Part of her needed to believe she was not the cause of death, that she had not somehow willed this to happen. When she had first met Malina the wolf had given her ideas of being a collector of secrets. Stealing something that would not otherwise harm the others involved. She wondered what then. Would these secrets hurt the others or protect them. Her young mind raced. Even her eyes fluttered with the overwhelming number of thoughts that gripped her. Gentle pants came from her soft lips and her body quivered once. Change was hard, but she was trying and she was struggling. She did not be what her mother had named her. Maggot. Spawn. Wretch. Pariah.
to love me...