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there's only one thing that I wanna feel right now

Name: Eileithyia, aka "Elle"
Age: young adult
Gender: female
Parents: open to interpretation
Siblings: an older brother
Significant other: that's one for the books. Mated to, that mate got killed.
Pups: stillborn or miscarried. All of them.
Best friend: Siku
Enemy: Siku
Rank: plotted slave of Siku
Species: red wolf
Description: slender and small, her body is a little smaller than 140 cm long. She carries the classic coloring of a red wolf, with a darker dusky red as the main player on her body stage. The silver of her forehead extends down the length of her muzzle, interspersed with a small gradient of red at the end. Only on her creme underbelly does it really show, her scars, and all of the blood she's worn throughout her life.
Special Effects/Mutations: difficulty speaking due to a scar on her throat
Special Marks/Scars: There are plenty of smaller cuts and scratches on her body that never seem to go away, but the biggest scar on her body is along her left flank- a blazing red gash that refuses to fully heal. It may not be anything life-threatening now, but it would be a big problem if she ever needed to escape from someplace. Scar on her throat prevents her from talking all too loudly.
Personality: very fearful, always peeping in shadows for fear that somebody will come after her. She doesn't seem to know how to be any other way and doesn't feel safe in her own skin. Tail tip gone.
Biography: Born to a father who didn't care and a mother who didn't want her, Elle was definitely the runt of the litter. Barely ever ate anything, because there was hardly ever anything left on which to feed... if she was able to eat at all. The only she-wolf who cared for her when she was young died in a horrific fire, which was blamed not on nature, but on the baby Elle. Disgusted, her parents stymied her more. However, beneath the guise of not caring, her father raped her and allowed any who would to do the same. Her mother thrashed her when she tried to tell her of her mate's infidelity, and both parents abused her as they pleased. She was used like a hunting prayer, only in that she would be bludgeoned, beaten, and abused. Living in fear, she was ordered by her pack alpha (whose litter she had previously miscarried) to go seeking out Siku's pack- to bring them down. Fearing the consequences upon her head and knowing no love for anyone, she went.
But, as fate would have it, Siku was kind to her. He befriended her, and though she had no one, she wanted to believe that she could be free with him. She started to trust him. After a year with Siku and his family, she was found by the pack she'd been born into. The alpha, thoroughly irritated, was seeking the life of Siku. Her blood ran cold at the thought, but she knew in the pit of her stomach that she couldn't leave him to die. She looked his mother and father in the eye one last time, hoping they could sense it, hoping they could feel her pain, and then begged to be escorted home. She knew, despite her best efforts, she wouldn't be able to save them all. But she could at least save Siku.
It was when they were far enough away that she could feel their blood on her hands, where she practically broke down. Holding her cool as much as she could, she apologized to Siku, letting him go.
But, of course, there's never a happy ending for this one, is there? After seeing the only family she'd felt a part of demolished in the blink of an eye, the family that spat on her like dirt decided that she was finally worth their time. That she was worthy of a position beside their alpha. And, oh, wouldn't she be happy with that. But she wasn't. She was never happy with that. Raped day in and day out again, it wasn't until she was showing signs of pregnancy that she was fed sufficient food to keep her from the brink. Often throwing up in the beginning, she could only pray that Siku had gone on to live a good life. But she couldn't even get that wish granted.
He came, and he saw her, standing beside the mate she hated, carrying his pups. He set out on the war path, his cry carrying as he one by one set to work on the wolves that had abused her. They finally got their just dues, but this wasn't how she wanted it to come. The horror in her expanded every time Siku took a packmate's final breath from them. Was this what was to become of all who were nice to those like her? Tears welled in her eyes as she thought of all the times that she had felt safe beside him, watching as those memories were dashed right before her eyes by the wolf himself. She wore her fear like a cape, and her pain like silks. This wasn't the Siku she knew.
As she was approached at the last, his mouth curled around the fatally wounded dead, he spoke to her. Confirmed her nightmares, her every waking memory of that place firmly planted in a sea of blood. Her voice, in the midst of hysteria, came out sounding distant at first. But, as she saw what she thought was movement from the alpha's body, she threw her body over it and her voice became far more desperate. To the point of yelling. "I hope you find love one day and have it ripped from you! I hope one day your cold heart gets broken and thrown away! You’re a monster! Siku!" Her eyes dripped tears of shock and the pain of knowing that he was, indeed, right. That if she didn't exist, that if she was anyone but herself, then just maybe, he would still have his family. Would still even be happy. She howled her painful knowledge to the sky, a mourning cry for the kind-hearted Siku she had loved.
If there was any doubt, she lost the litter. She lost the family she'd learned to trust. With the ones who mistreated her gone, she felt nothing for their deaths but numb, knowing that the pain comes from her feelings for the other side of that equation. So, she wanders- numb, scarred, and alone.
Favorite Food: anything that doesn't hurt to eat
Favorite Plant: anything that doesn't hurt to eat.
Introvert/Extrovert: heavy introvert
OOC: arsene
RP/Plot Availability: plotted slave of Siku

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