Look, okay, it’s not my fault I fell out of a tree.

It’s been a couple of weeks since I ended up in this land of, um, Milady-whatever. For the most part I’ve been sticking to the open grassland where I can see things coming (apart from Eto, but to be honest I think I could be on top of a mountain with eyes in every direction and still not see Eto coming), but then I started to get hungry. Mum had sort of shown me and my sister Thalia some hunting skills before I got separated from them, but I’d never done it on my own before. Unfortunately, between my missing family and my grumbly stomach, I didn’t have a whole lot of choice. So I picked myself up and padded off to the nearest place which looked like it might be able to rustle up some grub, which is the forest.

So there’s me, minding my own business, looking for food, when suddenly I hear something scurrying around in the undergrowth. I stand really still for a moment (I’m good at that) and then slowly, carefully, start to move in the direction of the noise. In a little clearing just past the undergrowth, a furry red squirrel is scuttling about on the floor, looking for the place it hid its nuts. I start to salivate. Being oh so careful and still totally minding my own business here, I lower my belly to the floor and start to creep forward, keeping my eyes fixed on dinner.

Unfortunately, my eyes are so fixed on dinner that I don’t notice that something else has had the same idea. Even more unfortunately, me and the something else both pick the same moment to leap from our respective hiding places. I’m so close, the thrill of the hunt rushing through my blood – when something a lot bigger than me with a lot more teeth flashes in front of me and snatches my meal right out from in front of me. I don’t hesitate. I hit the breaks, skidding to a halt, and scramble round, nearly tripping over my own paws in the process. A split second later I’m gone, sprinting through the forest, hoping the thing doesn’t decide to give chase.

Of course it does, because I have no luck whatsoever.

That’s when I have the brilliant idea of climbing a tree. I’m not going to lose the thing out here – not when it knows the terrain and I don’t. There are a few rocks and a low-hanging branch up ahead, so I grab the opportunity and take a flying leap. I land (scrabbling a little) on the rocks and jump from there to the tree branch. I don’t pause to find out if the thing can climb too, but start scrambling up the tree trunk, digging my claws in and reaching wildly for branches and knots in the tree. I’m doing pretty well until I accidentally put my weight on a branch which is too thin, and that’s when I go crashing to the forest floor.

The thing is gone, fortunately, or else I’d totally be dead meat. I land on my back and have the wind knocked out of me. Unable to take a breath or move, I just lie there, paws dangling in the air, literally a sitting duck for anything else with big teeth which wants to come for a nibble.

LEFTERIS
homeless year-old cub. bugs suck.