adolescence is an odd thing. one day ziva still feels like a pup and the next she’s ready to spread her wings in the world, long legs and all. she’s really hardly more than a child, but she still feels like she’s more grown up. after all, she’s nothing like her little siblings and they’re the actual children. she looks older and she likes to think she’s more mature than they are. what’s the fun in games of hide and seek? ziva has better things to do, like explore or hunt. or even start looking for her own den. her parents den was crowded enough when all seven of them were pups, but now with three teenagers, four growing pups, and two adults it’s become almost stifling. she needs her own space. the ess still wants to be close to her family - she needs her space, but she doesn’t want to leave them behind - but that doesn’t mean she can’t explore other options for dens right?
at least, that’s what ziva is using to justify her leaving dierne. she knows she’s old enough to do as she pleases and that her parents can’t do much to stop her or chastise her. nevertheless, the sudden independence is taking her a bit to get used to. but she’ll be damned if it isn’t exhilarating. freedom tastes better than she ever could have imagined, better even than elk. ziva would be lying if she said she didn’t feel a rush every time she broke a rule that had been imposed on her as a pup. there hadn’t been all that many, but it felt good nonetheless. if there was such thing as an adolescence high, she’s riding it.
the sun is just beginning to go down as ziva crosses the border, the sky alive with golds and reds and pinks. she’s always wanted to go out exploring at night, but never had the courage to do so before. today, for whatever reason, she’s found it. perhaps it isn’t the best decision she’s ever made, but like all teenagers, her risk assessment isn’t amazing. before it was her sister who was daring; now it’s ziva’s turn to throw caution to the wind. honestly, she doesn’t even want to do anything really. she just wants to star gaze. yes, she could easily to that within the confines of the pack, but where’s the fun in that? it’s not exciting staying at home anymore. which is exactly the reason she’s leaving. the sun is behind her, casting a fierce gold light on her path as ziva makes her way to glaesfaet. she quite like the river, mostly because it’s close to the pack, but also just because the water makes everything look prettier. and beauty is very important to ziva. not only her own, but the beauty of everything around her. there’s no appeal to looking at something that’s ugly.
tonight is no exception. ziva adores the stars, but the look even better twinkling in the water. her neck will hurt tomorrow from looking up and down so much, but it’s worth it. daytime is nice, but it will never compare to this, she thinks. there’s nothing more magnificent than seeing the sky full of tiny lights. it makes her feel very small, but ziva quite likes that. she’s on top of the food chain, but in the vast expanse of the universe she is tiny, insignificant. there’s always something bigger out there and the thought somehow comforts her. sometimes it’s nice to step back and remember that even if you fuck up, in the grand scheme of things it doesn’t matter at all. the world fill keep spinning, the universe will still be there, the sun will always rise, and the stars will always come back.
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