i don’t wanna to take it out on you , take it out on you; but i do
“It is not your fault,” she murmurs again, the words muffled for the way she presses them tenderly to Björn’s neck. Tigerlily seeks to reassure, knowing all too well that there was something attractive or magnetic about the power of Warsaw. She had sensed what he was capable of, and as a young, lone filly, it had terrified her into fleeing from him. But she could imagine he’d be a capable ally to a stallion such as Björn. Or a dangerous enemy.
She cannot bear the distance she carved between them, and so, even as the Ridge King processes what has been said between them, Tigerlily tucks herself back into his side, craving closeness with him, hungering for his touch even as she hungers for air. And the stallion’s words settle upon her skin, removing an ugly weight from her that she had been struggling to carry alone for so long.
It wasn’t her fault. The mare is overcome by emotion and sobs into Björn’s shoulder. She is comforted beyond words by his gentle truth.
“Thank you. Thank you,” she croaks, echoing the one she loved with the whole of her bruised and wildly beating heart. Tigerlily says nothing for some time, just listens intently to every word that leaves the lips of her king, and slowly recovers herself, steadying her breathing.
“I do not want to tell you which path to take from this place,” she murmurs, resting her chin across his withers, breathing slow and steady and pressing close to him, both seeking and giving warmth and comfort as her heart danced to its staccato beat within her chest. She feared for him, and as much as she did not want him to confront Warsaw in such a manner, the words he had spoken just now bolstered her like nothing else could. That she mattered to Björn, and that he could care so much for her, given everything she’d just confessed, and everything she had not… This moment between them served to cast her spine in ice and iron, so that even if she was forced to bended knee, never again would she be broken and brought low in the manner Warsaw had. Tigerlily was loved by a great heart, and this love had forever changed her.
“You are a rare soul, Björn, and you live with honour. I would never ask you to deny who you are, or to go back on your word. Whatever oath you made with him, that belongs to you alone, even though with all my heart I wish you had been spared from his want for war.”
Tigerlily’s heart trembles in her chest as she recalls his words, pounding out an intrepid and rebellious rhythm.
If you still wish to leave… That which she had spoken mere moments ago no longer mattered. Björn had dignified her in a way no other ever had, and put her own desires and wellbeing ahead of his own. How could she leave him now?
Oh, how could she ever leave him? With a deep sigh, she lifts her head, noses gently at Björn’s thick mane as she shifts her position, standing beside him, her muzzle drifting once more along the line of his strong jaw in the gentlest of caresses.
“Come what may, I will not leave,” she said softly, voicing her change of mind – speaking the truth in her heart.
“You’ve given me more than enough reason to trust that you will protect me from him, if he ever shows his face here again. And if there comes a time when he stands against you, and you against him… ”
Tigerlily trailed off, drew back to meet Björn’s glacial gaze, her own blue eyes wide and honest and shining with all that she felt for him.
“I will be right beside you. I will never leave you.” Her words, each and every one of them, are earnest and unwavering.
“I will fight by you and for you. Until the very end. That is what I believe the Norns have laid out for me – the path I am to follow.” There are no tears in her eyes, no trace of the fear and sorrow and pain she felt earlier. The darkness in her has been extinguished, and a new fire sparks within – one that burns strong and unafraid. The buckskin mare is at peace, finally, thanks to the grullo stallion. And she will be forever grateful to him.
“You saved me.” The words are an echo, from another time and another place, but they ring just as true.
“And I will do anything for you.” A shiver travels down her spine, and her voice turns sombre and husky.
“Be safe. Promise you’ll come back to me.”
T I G E R L I L Y
it feels like i’m breaking down, watching my words cut you in two