He didn’t have to wonder who was on the other side for long.

He sat there with his hands cupped in lap but when he hear the voices he started anxiously ringing his wrists. That voice, he knew that voice.

Era sat down beside him on the floor, the weight of her side pressed against him.

It took him a moment to decide whether he was going to stay or going to leave. Uncertain if he wanted to face reality head on just yet. Grayson had been back for a while, but the pair of them avoided each other like the same end of a magnet. Grayson, forever embarrassed for the grief he’d caused Thoth all those years ago. He should have been there for him, he thought he knew what it was like to lose a mother. But he didn’t know, he only thought he did. But Grayson's mother hadn’t died, she left - willingly. One was far more permanent than the other. The lose to Thoth had been far fresher then Graysons at the time and his foolish child self was trying to do the best he could. But his best cost him what little friendship he had developed with Thoth. He knew now that he had no right to say anything, but knowing it couldn’t unwrite the past. He couldn’t make any excuse anymore, he was still being as bull headed as he was back then. Grayson hadn’t wanted to face Thoth because he knew no matter what he did, he'd never be able to make amends for it.

And that was fair, Grayson deserved that. He probably deserved far worse.

Which is why, he thought, he should leave before he was noticed.

Just as he went to lift himself off of the bed the curtains flew open as the boy behind it called after the nurse. He was like a deer caught in a headlight, so surprised by the action he couldn’t get himself to move. Quickly, he had to decide to stay or draw attention to himself by leaving. He chose to stay.

The moment their eyes met Grayson understood. At least with Thoth he’d never have to guess where he stood. One corner of his mouth raised slightly, he could appreciate that. After being manipulated one too many times he was tired of guessing people's intentions. The last blow had come with the guy who lead an injured Grayson to The Stone Dragon during the raid. That really said something about himself, he was still too gullible.

The awkward silence coated the air like a thick fog for Grayson. He continued to ring his wrists and his fingers trying to bring his attention elsewhere but it wasn’t working. It lasted until it finally became too much. “Thoth,” he said, his voice low, soft,holding a hint of hesitation. He could feel Era pushing harder into his leg, urging him to go on. “I know you don’t like me, and that’s okay, I can live with that.” He sighed, using his right hand to run it through his hair, growing more anxious. “But I want you to know I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you. Or anyone” He looked towards the floor unable to maintain a gaze, letting his hands fall into his lap. “And thank you for being there for Tristan, I’m glad you both still have each other.”

He didn’t really expect anything, he just wanted to finally get that weight off of his chest. He also knew it was selfish of him. He looked behind him to see the bed furthest away was still empty, he jutted his thumb in that direction, “I can...move over if it makes you more comfortable?”