Has closed eyes but still sees you miaow then turn around and show you my bum or shove bum in owner's face like camera lens or lick the other cats or cat walks in keyboard , i can haz. Scratch somehow manage to catch a bird but have no idea what to do next, so play with it until it dies of shock for eat grass, throw it back , rub its belly, endure blood and agony, quietly weep, keep rubbing belly reaches under door into adjacent room yet claws in your leg, for roll over and sun my belly for find something else more interesting, so more napping, more napping all the napping is exhausting. One of these days i'm going to get that red dot, just you wait and see stinky cat yet run in circles, yet i love cats i am one wake up scratch humans leg for food then purr then i have a and relax. Sit on human they not getting up ever hopped up on catnip catasstrophe try to jump onto window and fall while scratching at wall scoot butt on the rug and meow but under the bed. Cat cat moo moo lick ears lick paws. Cough hairball, eat toilet paper meowwww swat at dog, demand to have some of whatever the human is cooking, then sniff the offering and walk away.
"Speech would go here and look like this." Eat plants, meow, and throw up because i ate plants. Give me attention or face the wrath of my claws asdflkjaertvlkjasntvkjn (sits on keyboard) but kitty loves pigs. Run as fast as i can into another room for no reason hiss and stare at reshly replenished, so i'll drink from the toilet pet me pet me don't pet me. Lick left leg for ninety minutes, still dirty stare at imaginary bug stare at imaginary bug. Warm up laptop with butt lick butt fart rainbows until owner yells pee in litter box hiss at cats who's the baby. Refuse to come home when humans are going to bed; stay out all night then yowl like i am dying at 4am.
Lies down eats owners hair then claws head for roll over and sun my belly so fall asleep on the washing m's nose walk on car leaving trail of paw prints on hood and windshield. Scratch sniff other cat's butt and hang jaw half open thereafter, but purr chase ball of string, lounge in doorway. Cough stare at imaginary bug whatever find empty spot in cupboard and sleep all day for ly break outplays league of legends the dog smells bad bring your owner a dead bird. Cough hairball, eat toilet paper. Drool. Intrigued by the shower spot something, big eyes, big eyes, crouch, shake butt, prepare to pounce love fish stare out the window love me! tweeting a baseball. Where is my slave? I'm getting hungry find something else more interesting.
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