Oswin watched her General leave with what felt closest to a broken heart she could remember feeling. Tears stung her eyes, hot, prickling, and she swallowed back hard against the emotion and ducked her head to rub her eyes on her knee. She lifted her head and shook it, then snorted, flicked her tail and turned away. From Klara’s outburst to what had just happened between she and Roisin, Oswin felt herself shaken.

And somewhere her heart was broken, because if not for this rift between her and Roisin, they might have come to find out they had the exact same reasoning for who they were. Oswin was only here because her dam had been treated horrifically by a nomadic beast on Crossing Isle, unable to defend herself. It had resulted in the birth of her brother and the trauma that followed practically his entire existence.

Still, Roisin’s firm belief against Tyr rang in her ears as Oswin walked down into the low hills, intending to find somewhere she could be alone. Her head hung low as her eyes darkened, thoughts clouded. She always feared she was terrible at picking mates, like somehow having a perfect father had given her a bad taste in men.

First had been Koray, and though Oswin had absolutely not wanted a child, there had been something exciting about fighting him across the Desert until she couldn’t fight him anymore. There had been something primal and satisfying that night between them. It had scared her, and it had made her never quite comfortable with saying he’d forced himself on her.

Then there was Ernesto, who was passion and romance and who admired her spirit and enjoyed her wit. He’d made Oswin feel as smart as he made her feel beautiful. But he had been a Lagoon bachelor. Had he stayed here long enough beneath Cullen’s reign to fall into line behind the barbaric Lagoon boss? Or had Ernesto fled when things began to get too serious? She would never see him again, so Oswin would never know.

Now there was Tyr, and Tyr was more than the past two combined. Tyr… Tyr meant something to Oswin, more than she was brave enough to admit out loud. She felt a deep understanding with him. A connection. She wanted to encourage the man he wanted to become, to show the islands that they didn’t need to keep to their barbaric and cruel practices.

But… how could she blame the victims of his past crimes for not believing a thread of it?

Or was she wrong and Roisin right? Was Tyr just playing her for a fool? Had she let her heart wrap her up in the wrong man yet again?

A pain suddenly ripped through her side so forceful she stumbled to an awkward stop and inhaled a loud, sharp breath. Her vision went fuzzy, then refocused. Anxiety squeezed her heart and her wild eyes pointed desperately for the Peak in the distance. “No!” She cried out painfully, realizing she wasn’t going to be able to get up to the top of the Peak to birth her second child with Tyr.

She was having them right now and fear struck her heart, somehow immediately understanding it was going to be just as horrible and terrifying as Oswald’s had been to get through. She only hoped it would be rewarding in the end rather than tragic. This would be a horrible note to die on.

oswin
this is as brave as I know how to be.
I know it’s gonna hurt you, but please… be a little proud of me.