IP: 189.16.21.50
Posted on January 17, 2013 at 03:32:45 AM by Laila
 “The Dark Hunter” <33 I don’t want to be angry at him. If I could just explain. Being angry at him hurts me so much… After so many years when I thought I had found someone who would really care about me, he left me alone? Why? I still can’t believe his words. It is me. It is the only possible explanation. It is me. Every single pack I even tried to join would not believe me, would not fight for me, would not help me. All of them would just kick me out, give me impossible tasks… And one of them, tried to abuse me. And they managed to… When I tried to leave, they grabbed my tail breaking it and forcing me to stay, this is the truth… After some time I finally managed to run away from that hell, with a crooked tail. I tried to change, in many ways, I really swear I did! I strived. But nothing works…. And… I still don’t even know what I have done wrong. Only shame is shown all over his body. He watches, as I cry in front of him. When I am finally able to speak again, his lips gently pull into a smile and his eyes brighten for a moment. I am happy to see that he seems to care for our children. It takes some time, but I finally raise my head, asking him if I meant anything at all to him. I needed to know. His answer is quick and for a moment, it seems as if I have assaulted him. With wide eyes, he answers. His words are so sweet, so kind. Nobody had ever said that to me. And Camelot seems very sincere. I don’t know what to think… - To be there… To say that you care… That’s how to care for someone. To sacrifice things just to see them happy. I told him. He didn’t know how to care for someone? I do understand. Is that how it feels? Is that how it feels when I did so many bad things to the others? My tears kept falling as my body lowered to the ground, letting my body slowly fall. How many years it took for me to learn how to care about those I love? So long it had been until I could finally understand. I can’t just blame him for… Not knowing how to care… For I didn’t know as well. I didn’t know how to care for someone before. - I… Forgive you, Camelot… - The words, relieving and still sad. I paused a second and with tears still falling, I spoke once more - You mean… So much to me. I’m sorry for what I said, Camelot. I didn’t mean it. I’m so sorry. Forgive me, Camelot. I waited, hoping he would understand. I didn’t mean that. I was angry, and… I didn’t even have the right to be angry at him. He means so much to me. - I am alone, Camelot. I don’t have anywhere to go, I have nobody. I’m so afraid. I curled up and wrapped my tail around my legs. I need help, I need someone. Hunting for all three of us was becoming harder. I hoped that this new place would change this, that we would find shelter and food here. But alone, it would be much harder. Laila 13 years old | Lonely Wolfess | Camelot imprintee | Mother to Anemone & Connor |
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