At Leisure Lake the sun is always shining and only a few stray clouds roam the open sky; paradise is the one word that really describes it. This beautiful lake is clean and refreshing, the very best place to swim and fish. Pups are known to play here while older wolves watch at the side, engaged in their own activities.
IP: 12.231.36.2
Posted on July 24, 2013 at 03:49:25 PM by King Kong
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I feel like I can't breathe, like my insides are being choked right out of me. My chest feels uncomfortably tight, my breathing shallow and rapid as I sprint across the ground like a madman. I don't know what came over me. Maybe it was the look. Akina was just about to notice him but I'd seen the look in Titan's eyes and to me, that was like sealing the deal. He worships her. He sees her as an angel; he sees her as everything I see her. The only difference is, they have history. He's fathered her children. He was probably her first love and she was his. For all I know, they grew up together, like childhood sweethearts. Sure, they've had their low points when he would disappear for weeks or months at a time but he always comes back. Maybe I should have been telling her to wait on him instead of pushing myself onto her, wanting her to love me like she can only love him. Who am I to get between something like that? Nobody. I'm undeserving of her love. I'm a monster. At least he has honor. I know about the Demonican clan, how they lust blood like nothing else, how they're like one big crazy family but the keyword there is family. They watch out for each other. When something happens, they call the clan together and everyone acts as one. It's admirable, really. I never knew family like that. I'm a loner, a solitary demon who walks the earth alone, always alone. There was a time when I thought I could maybe love another. Her name was Miya and she ate holes in my cold heart with her laughter and her patient looks. Maybe she could have been the one for me but I fucked it up somehow. Maybe she didn't want me because she saw right through me, knew what I truly was. Maybe she couldn't love a monster. I don't blame her. I don't blame Akina either. We're from two different worlds. She's leagues above me. Titan probably is too. She hasn't made her decision but maybe I should do the honorable thing for once and make it for her, or at least make it an easier decision to make. It's not like I deserve to be in the running in the first place. I was better off alone. Alone is safe. Alone, I don't have to worry about hurting anyone, cause there's no one to hurt but myself. I guess I lied to myself, telling myself Akina would heal me. The darkness was easier to keep at bay as long as she was near. When she went away, my heart ached and the darkness threatened to engulf me. I became a danger to myself, to others. I think of Aurora and my place in it as its Beta. Under Sin, Titan shared that place with me but Kal doesn't know him. Maybe Titan will get back with Akina and they'll go back to Aurora. Maybe Kal will learn to trust him, depend on him like he tries to do with me. He'll probably be more successful with Titan. Then he'll have that place all to himself and I'll be alone once more. Alone and safe. I find myself on the banks of the lake, looking out over a stormy sky. The clouds are darkening, the thunder already rolling in with flashes of lightening to herald the coming rain. I close my eyes, letting my senses take control, my nose tasting the moisture in the air and the electricity to come. I can still recall my last real memory of this place, the rain falling down, the lightening streaking across the sky. I was here with Miya and she was so beautiful with the rain soaking her fur and her eyes were so bright in the darkness. She would look at me and smile and I'd melt inside, forgetting for a moment what I am, who I am. Forgetting everything but her. Just for a moment, I'd feel like a normal wolf with feelings, a wolf who wants to be loved. But I can't. I can't be loved becauase anyone who tries would see my true self and they'd be scared of me. They would run, because otherwise they wouldn't survive. I met Miya on the borders of Munashii Gekko. She ended up there looking for a home back when it was run by vampire wolves, wolves who hunted at night and drank their own species' blood and killed for sport. I despised them and what they did to my home. I warned her away and in the meantime, we drew close, but it was a false sense of closeness. It was never meant to be. King Kong.male.adult.loved by none.father of none.no siblings.Beta of Aurora Borealis |
Replies:
- and life doesn't stop for anybody - By Ninkou Latora July 29, 2013 at 10:16:16 AM
i belong with the corpses - By King Kong August 6, 2013 at 10:41:37 PM
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