The pain comes when we are less ready, when we are most hopeful. It comes with full strength to shatter the heart to pieces. It is why most of us feel the way we do. Lost within our own emotions. This is the way we feel. We don’t know what to feel. We feel sadness and for a moment all the hope is gone and all it is left is an empty space that keeps aching constantly, making us remember our loss and we feel pain because it is all we are able to do. We feel angry for being so helpless for being unable to do anything but just watch as those we love are drifting away. We feel afraid, because we have never planned this life without them. We were not prepared for such moment and all it comes to our head is what will we do without them, how will it be without them. Tears roll down the muzzle of even the strongest wolf and all we can do is watch.

This is the pain of loss. I know it, yes. I know how it feels and in my lonely nights in the woodlands this feeling comes back every once in a while. I’ve lost an entire pack to a rain of fire that came from the sky and the only wolf I have got to blame is not entirely responsible for what happened. The only thing I wished was for him to feel the same as I did. I had friends, I had a family and all is lost in mere seconds and what I could do? I felt tempted to throw myself in the flames and end that pain, but I couldn’t, it was too late.

Now, from my spot not far away, I am forced to watch as the same pain reaches their hearts and not from only one wolf, but from many. Small pups, adults, young wolves. Once again I find myself helpless… I cannot do anything to help and I cannot do anything to relieve their pain. I can’t even approach for I know they would not wish an outsider there. But my presence is known, surely they would be able to see the dark silhouette of a big wolf not far away in the middle of the night, watching, but unable to do anything.

It was then that the idea came to my head and with a sigh I promised. Not again.

”I am your prince charming”

.Attu