It has been awhile since I have come to see my Mother. This past year I wandered to investigate the other packs. I wanted to prove my use and show that I am not just some pup. I wanted to be seen in a good light. I may not have royal blood, I may not be of importance to anyone…even my own parents, but at least I could have a bit of pride in myself. Today I decided to come find the only parent that I knew where her location may be. My Mother was a very quiet soul and she hardly wished to be among others. It was no surprise that Mother would hanging out here in the darkness, between the rocks far from others. I enter the hidden labyrinth with ease and silence. My massive crimson paws easily grip the rocks as I slide down into the depths. I am carrying with me a heavy badger. This was such a nasty creature. It put up an attack, but I was far faster and clever. I was hoping to give the badger to my Mother to hopefully, hopefully, get her to speak. I want to hear praise. It is all I really seek…recognition for doing something right. Ever since I left Spirane, my mind was filled with self-doubt and emptiness. For so long I was used to not having anyone see me for me or really communicate with me. I was left in the dark and alone. Yet I didn’t let it bother me…not as much as it is bothering me now. Not after I visited with Alith.

That white wolfess made me feel things…it made me feel like I was wanted…like I was appreciated it. Even though she treated me with cautiousness she still showed me something I was not shown before. I think it was love…maybe? Well I wouldn’t say it was love, but I think I would call it something like…being liked. Being liked is a good feeling. I mean it brings some sort of satisfaction. I think Andras was happy I came back with some information. Getting a small notice is better than nothing, but I hope to do it again. But for now I just really needed to see Mother. I just wanted to feel her warmth, I wanted to curl up against her. For so long I’ve slept alone I’ve forgotten what it is like to be beside someone at night. I am hoping the badger I bring her will sedate her enough to want to stay at my side. Her scent isn’t as strong as it once was. All I could detect was an older male, an older male’s scent that was so very familiar. I cannot help by freeze as my violet eyes narrow and quickly scan the area. He attacked me…that is why I remember the scent so well. He attacked me when I had done nothing wrong. The Angels protected me and here I was alone.

Concerned I continue to inch further making sure that his scent remained old. Yet as I got closer and closer to the end of this trail I catch another scent. This scent was female and I could have sworn it was Mother’s. As I creep on down closer, hoping that my nose was right, I came across the white and red wolf, lying down. This was not my Mother and my scent of hers was wrong…perhaps I have forgotten what Mother smelled like. With a muffled bark I lower my head, my ears falling to my skull in a submissive manner. The badger still hanging from my mouth. Slowly I tread a bit closer, my eyes roaming over her carefully, hoping she would not attack me. Keeping my tail low I drop the badger and nudge it gently in her direction. I stand and simply watch, making myself smaller and non-threatening. Hopefully the badger will provide me insurance. Perhaps if she eats I might be able to run away and exit the grotto and search again for Mother.