[ male ] [ seven ] [ mateless ] [ imprintless ] [ covet x malina ]

There were times when he forgets who he is, because he had pushed it all back so far for so long. A juggernaut to his own personality, whatever it had once been. He does know, at least, that what had been wasn't as kind as he presented himself to be now. Less polite, less of a lot of things, though he knows it won't help him to have been that creature now. He had to put it all aside and change for what was needed. That was his big secret. He was only trying to change for the needs of getting to where he wanted to be. Yet he had shown real parts not long ago, and he wonders if that was all the confirmation he needed.

It did open his eyes a little to the fact that he had been right on the matter, that he had to be different from what he had become over those years to get by here. He had to adapt, and he was. It made him stronger, he was sure, but there would be times when he faulters, because nothing came that easy. Riot accepted this fact, and he reminds himself on what he calls himself and why; the fact that it tells him to remember what the past had been. Not an easy one, but he would overcome it all because that was the kind of creature that he was. He got through it because he would allow no less of himself. He would achieve more.

When Renai spoke, answered his musings, Riot looked at her thoughtfully, nodding his head to the response. It was good to have met her here and now, when he was debating these things, because he should know better than to even cut himself short. She was right, and he needed to just wait it out. Something would show itself in time. It had to. "It's hard to be patient, however." He replied with a little smile, but he would take her advice, because he had needed to hear it. Riot would start anew soon enough, but he does have to wonder to what it would all lead. A part of him already knows, but had to be certain of it first. Time could always change things.