I am my Mother's daughter. There is a part of me that is meant to be a cruel and cold killer. The crimson mark between my eyes that was nestled perfectly in the middle of my forehead bore my destiny. This mark was so very similar to my Mother as did its meaning. In her lands it was a dreaded curse mark that branded her as a Monster, it branded me as a Monster and I am afraid that one day I will turn into something like her. I don't want to. I want to do things that are good. So, I'm trying to make up for all the sins I will commit in the future. It isn't something I'm happy or proud about, but I must own up to it and be responsible. I’m not sure how Mother became as she was. Perhaps someone taught her to kill as she taught me on prey animals? Maybe one day she woke up and just had the desire to just kill other wolves? Maybe her pack was right? Mother may have just naturally been inclined to harm others sense birth. I think I might have been like her, but Father was a very kind wolf, this I remember from my very tiny limited moments when I saw him. His blood may be calming the natural killer instincts from Mother. Though I could just be developing at a slower pace. Who knows? What I do know is that I do not want to be a Monster like Mother and I think Mother won’t be one…if she just had someone that cared for her.

Yes, she abandoned me, but I just…need to know and see her again. Is that hard to ask? Apparently it is. Once again I follow her familiar aroma, but I am disappointed to discover that she had once again eluded me. I am not sure if she is doing it on purpose to stay away from me, or if she is trying to get away from someone else, or this is just her natural habit, but I know for sure I do not like it. As I walk through the tall grass and boulder I am unaware that someone else is watching me. In many ways I do look mostly like my Mother, but my face his not mauled on both sides and I only carry one old scar where she carries many. Tobias gave me that old wound along my shoulder, but thankfully he didn’t do too much damage. I guess I really was in the City of Angels, because a swarm of them came to take drive him away and helped patch me up. They were very kind and it instantly made me think that perhaps the old thoughts that were given to me in Iromar were severely outdated and insanely incorrect. I stand quietly within the brush sighing softly and shaking my head as I close my eyes. Inhaling deeply I try one more time to pick up her scent, but sadly my extra sniffs are useless. I am unaware that there is a figure perched on the boulder looking down upon me with much disgust and hate.

I didn’t see it. I couldn’t see it. I felt the paws place squarely on my back and the pressure of unknown weight force me to the ground. I feel the sharp fangs pierce and dig into my flesh between my shoulder blades, but I manage to throw and toss my neck, forcing my body to go up, as I shake back and forth, causing the teeth to slide down towards my muscle – protecting that special and vulnerable section that mostly exposed my spine. With a painful cry I swing my neck around my jaws snapping and catching nothing but air as I try to grab my assailant. My mind is spinning and I am in complete shock. She was holding onto the side of my neck, but thanks to me attempting to fling her around, her teeth continue to graze and dig deeper to where she is somehow grabbing tightly. I fall to the ground unable to get myself up. I manage to try and roll onto my back as I force my crimson paws into her stomach, trying to claw at her desperately. I know I am in such a terrible position and I know she is capable of killing me. I’m not sure why she would want to. I haven’t done anything to her. As we both struggle I can feel the cool slime of mud getting into my fur, my crimson marks soiled with dark brown. I let out another cry as I feel one of her claws rake the side of my face during our struggle and I gasp as I feel her weight on me increase as she keeps me pin. I don’t know why I am being attacked, maybe because she was like Mother and had the need to kill, or maybe I wandered on her territory, I don’t know, but I am terribly afraid.

I think this is my Death. At least I made it to my fourth year. At least I was able to make it as a Consul for Iromar. I hope Mother knows I tried to fight back…even though I was terrible at it. Aithne, I have let her down, but I hope she hears of this. I’m not sure if I will be truly missed by anyone. No one will miss me really. I will be forgotten and that hurts. Yet I guess that is to be expected of a daughter from a Servitor. Maybe I’ll see him when I am dead? I wish I could see Mother just one more time. I wish I could tell her. I wish before I died I could at least feel the care and love of another. Yet all I feel is my blood trickling from my wound, I can feel her form press tighter onto my own, I can see that one horribly glaring red eye back at me, and I feel so…helpless. I stare at my would be killer, wondering what have I done wrong in my life to deserve this?