☪Even in the darkness, all I see are the stars☪

He had searched her out? And… Was apologizing for not doing it sooner? Both of those things completely baffled her, left her confused, and yet overjoyed. She had had very few positive interactions with other wolves. Her interaction with her mother had not been a true interaction with Kahlan, but rather aninteraction with her alter ego, Henadin. And Henadin, though he had cared for her, had been mainly seriously, teaching her everything she needed to know, sharing all of Kahlan’s years of training with her in the course of a few months. Never was she coddled, but instead was haunted by the daunting task in front of her. And then Brie has been found by Draven, essentially the devil himself. And finally there had been Rogan and Diosa. Both of them had been kind... but for that exact reason she had not been allowed to interact with them often except for when it benefitted Draven. So Lupin... he was unique and also a mystery to her. Briseis’ growl ceased, and instead she let loose a soft whine, encouraging him closer, into her makeshift den. That is… Until she looked at him and saw his façade turn into something of confusion… And perhaps fear? Her gaze shifted between him and the pups at her tits, and she shook her head - this had not been how she had wanted him to find out. Hell, she had really not planned on him finding out at all, but she also had assumed he would want nothing to do with them. And yet here she was - swollen and bloodied from the recent birth only minutes before, her newborn pups suckling at her teats, and the father of her kids standing before her agape.

“I… I was going to tell you. If I ever saw you again. But… I did not mean for you to find out like this. And I wasn’t trying to get pregnant… I really did not think I could. And I’m not expecting anything… I know this isn’t your responsibility, it’s mine. I’m not going to force you into anything.” Her vocals trailed off and she pinned her ears back, averting her bright lavenders. Out of instinct, she curled around her pups even tighter, protectively, shielding them from his judgmental view. “They don’t… They don’t even need to know your name if you do not want them to. I can’t say they will be entirely safe with me… And I can’t tell you why that is. But if the choice is between my life for theirs, I will die to protect them. If… If I can.” Already, thoughts of Draven commanding her to step aside from her pups ran through her mind, terrifying her. If he were to find out about them… He could command her not to do anything while he did whatever he wanted with them - tortured them, killed them, ate them… Or worse. Raise them as his own… “I will do what I can for them, I am sorry… I did not mean to complicate your life.”

Briseis turned her face away from his and nuzzled the tufts of fur at her belly. She had thought that if perhaps she could keep that one, pure memory of him and her alone in the night, it would be the one hope that she would hold onto, to keep herself safe, to keep her mind sane. But it was nearly destroyed now, as he stood there, saying nothing. If only… He would say anything. It was not that she regretted her pups - it was new life, a miracle she never thought she would see happen. But it was terrible, having it like this. Seeing the way he saw her. It marred the one beautiful memory she had, the one intimate setting she had without torture pain. It had been dreadful, being Draven‘s Mesmer, and although she had never had any suicidal thoughts, she had trouble finding a reason to live, a reason to hope for a better future. And then after her night with Lupin, she had found something redeeming in life - that one memory. It made lying to Kershov not quite as bad, and at least it gave her something beautiful to think about before she went to bed, giving her some semblance of dreams instead of repeating nightmares that she was used to. But it was ruined now… all ruined because he found her - and them… And said nothing but stared.

“Please… Please Lupin. Say something. Anything. I can’t have my last memory of you to be this.” Though it hurt her, she pulled her snout away from her pups and turned it toward Lupin so that she was staring straight at him, her lip quivering slightly. Whether he said anything or not, he would have to say it to her face.

Ω Briseis Ω Chained to Draven Ω Slave of Caidir Olc Ω Azura ΩTable Credit to Xathira