you shouldn’t walk where the hemlock grows

Faolain’s heart hurt for the Ridge’s second herd. She was relieved when the pale form of Iscariot ambled up the path toward them - she didn’t know how to comfort the filly, didn’t even know if her presence was wanted or helpful, but Iscariot would know what to do. She caught the perlino’s eye and whickered to him, watching as he wrapped Roisin in love and attention, two things Faolain realized with guilt that she hardly knew how to provide. On the mainland, she might have gotten away with this shortcoming, but she could no longer ignore it as a leader.

When Roisin opted not to send the two adults away, Faolain felt relief. She thought it might be a bad sign if the dun filly had dismissed them, but neither Fae nor Iscariot could force their company on her. It would only push her away, Faolain was sure of that.

For a time, the black ‘Teke remained silent as Roisin relaxed into Iscariot’s embrace. She tried to dispel the anxiety - no, the impatience, which wasn’t fair at all - at not being able to help, or to fix things right then. She pressed into her own head over and over that you can’t force someone to heal, you can’t guilt them into it, you can do nothing but be there if they want you to be. It helped, a little, though it was not in Faolain’s nature to stand by. She thought that maybe there was something she could do, something that Iscariot would do, like wrap Roisin up in a hug, but she wasn’t sure if the girl wanted Faolain to touch her. Iscariot was welcoming and warm, and the dark Ridge Guardian was, well… dark.

She had dismissed the idea of a comforting touch when Roisin’s voice reached her again, stronger this time, but somehow more sober. It should have been me. The words and the rest that followed made Faolain shiver. She did not know how the dun filly could have come to this conclusion, that she was useless for not somehow stopping the vicious silver mare. Faolain would understand, soon, when she would come to learn of Rivaini’s sacrifice, but the actions of the copper Guardian were as of yet unknown to her. It seemed obvious to the black mare that Roisin was not at fault, and was certainly not useless, but that did not change the fact the Roisin clearly felt responsible. It must be a terrible burden to bear, she thought, and then changed her mind about giving them space.

Faolain stepped forward and sandwiched Roisin between herself and Iscariot. She snaked her neck around Iscariot’s other shoulder, and peeked over his pale withers at where Roisin nestled. She did not squeeze, but just stood there, pressed lightly against the two. She had decided that if she had to choose between suffocating Roisin with comfort she did not want, and mentally abandoning her for fear of pushing her away, Faolain would err on the side of suffocation because if nothing else, at least Roisin would know it was an option. She could push Faolain away if she wanted, but that was alright. The message was there.

”You are not responsible for Nyimara’s actions,” she said, her voice gentle but firm. ”It is my job to keep things like this from happening, and I failed, not you. I owe you an apology for not stopping this. I will do what I can to make it right.” She didn’t know what could be done at this point - irreparable damage was made every time Nyimara came crashing into the Ridge - but she would try to keep it from happening again. She would have to talk to Ailill and come up with a plan, but she could no longer sit by and do nothing, even if they failed.

But this was not something she was yet willing to share with Roisin. She did not want to burden her further, or cause more pain from the details of whatever it was she would do about Nyimara. For now, she remained still, pressed close to Roisin and Iscariot for as long as they let her stay. ”If you are upset with me, that is okay,” she said quietly. ”I would still like to be here for you. Also, you don’t have to call me Queen; just Faolain, or Fae is perfectly fine.”

mare | black | 14hh | akhal-teke