Her mind churns guiltily, thoughts tripping over themselves as she scrambles to come up with an explanation that would satisfy Ernesto if he were to find out she’d lost their daughter. Having to constantly watch Silicon like a hawk is exhausting, and since Selenium can’t stand to be in the Lagoon for long periods, she had taken the filly back to the falls once Silicon had been introduced to her father.

It’s amazing that the climate could be so different from the falls to here; it’s not nearly so cold here, though of course nowhere is as cold as Tinuvel, which Selenium thinks of longingly every winter. She enjoys Ernesto’s company, but there will probably never be another to match her first male friend, Aleksei. It’s days like this (which makes her feel even more guilty) that she wishes she’d had the chance all those years ago to join his herd.

Since Silicon is so unresponsive to everything around her, Selenium has no idea how far her daughter could have wandered. She has chosen to check the Lagoon first, since this is the only other place Silicon has been. If any part of the filly’s brain is normal, it would make sense for her to wander into her father’s home.

The large mare is not nearly so quiet as she usually is, less afraid of being forced to stay here when faced with the horrific possibility of finding her daughter in a state that she had occasionally seen a foal on Tinuvel end up in. She has to repeatedly remind herself that there are likely no wolves or bears here, but she doesn’t know if any of the stallions here are prone to violence against strange foals, and whether Ernesto would be able to arrive in time to stop something from happening.

She hears someone else crashing through the undergrowth, and while she knows it can’t be her daughter, perhaps Silicon will be drawn to the sound. She heads in that direction, hoping the whole time to see her oddly-marked, vulnerable child. Her blue eyes catch on a gold and white figure, and for once not caring if she were to run into one of the Lagoon band, she whinnies sharply.

”Excuse me!” she says loudly. As she gets closer, she notices the stranger – a mare, to her relief – is injured, and wonders if she’d been claimed by the Lagoon and fought back against coming here. Perhaps a little rudely, she can’t bring herself to ask if the mare’s okay before blurting out, ”Have you seen my daughter? She’s black and white – the white’s on the right side of her body and the left side of her face. She’s mentally handicapped and won’t survive long on her own.”

She's well past the stage of feeling ashamed of Silicon's disability, but she will always feel guilty that she'd brought it on her firstborn with her carelessness.