I am the razor in the hands of your heart;
And I am the razor in the hands of God.
When Valve never showed up to the Forest to help her son expel Psychedelic from this world, Evaline finally made up her mind. It was disappointing, of course. And Evaline was left alone to let those feelings fester for sometime in the aftermath of what transpired that day. But if Evaline wasn't important enough for the dark mare to show up and aid her in this endeavor, then Valve wasn't important enough to wait for, virtually all alone, in the Dunes, either. The golden mare didn't know where Valve went when she disappeared on his long escapades. It was not her business to ask her about it, though Evaline knew Valve would never share such details anyway. But Evaline had had enough of being left alone to her own devices. She didn't want to care for the few souls that still lingered in the Dunes. She didn't want to feel lonely anymore, or the turmoil that wrecked havoc on her when Valve was gone. The anxiety that came while she waited for her return was excruciating. She was too old for this.
Persephone seemed kind enough. She was pretty too, in her own right, and very different from Valve. The Forest offered ample vegetation and a more mild climate for the older mare to retire to. Plus she was just a short jaunt away from Shamwari. She knew she could always return to the Prairie to live, but chose to spare her son of that nonsense. Evaline knew when she was wanted... Brienne had made it clear that she liked her best at arm's length from her and her children.
It had been weeks since Psychedelic fled from the Forest. Talya had given birth to her foal and Ruxin reappeared out of nowhere. It was a lot to deal with, but Evaline was grateful for the distraction -- her own maternal mishaps and misgivings left little room for the mare to dwell too much on how desperately she missed Valve. Perhaps she was given another chance to be a mother. Perhaps now she could focus less on herself and watch what she hoped would be the last of her children grow up. Even if she chose to do so passively -- close enough to help in an emergency, but not directly interfering for their well being.
It was a particularly warm day when Evaline decided to take the trail from the Forest to the Prairie. She knew Brienne was pregnant and likely would have birthed her next grandchild by now. Evaline tended to like her grand children more than her actual children, and she was somewhat delighted by the idea of meeting this newborn. But when she reached the rolling hills of the Prairie, she was surprised to find it so... quiet. Stale. Vacant.
The mare wandered slowly by herself, her nostrils flaring every so often in search of the scents of the horses she knew here. She made it all the way to the shoreline before she caught the musk of Shamwari in the sea breeze. And also her Paradiso. A small but excited smirk etched its way on her lips in surprise. She hadn't seen her youngest son in some time. When she spied the pair along the beach, she issued them a shrill call, and hurried over at a trot.
When she arrived, she was stunned by the look of exhaustion and distraught on Paradiso's face. The young, spotted stallion couldn't even feign a smile to his mother when she moved forward to assess Shamwari. "He's been like this for hours. Don't go any far forward. Bri is dead. She's in the dune." Paradiso explained matter-of-factly, brushing his mother with some half-hearted affection at her withers as she stormed by him. Evaline didn't bother looking in the distance for the body. She could smell it. Her glare was hot and intense upon her son, who lay in a heap in the hot sand.
She stepped in front of his view and put a hoof gently against his barrel for one second. "Shamwari, it's me. Get up." She said sternly, never once dropping her head to him to investigate further. The vast red stallion eyed her lazily from the ground, but did not move. Evaline took a deep breathe and looked over to Paradiso. "Where is Jabari? Does he know?" She barked, and Paradiso gave an unsure expression. "I haven't seen him." He replied. "Are there others? The blind one? What about the one she was supposed to give birth too?" Paradiso swallowed hard and looked blankly back at his mother.
"Get up, you dumb fool!" She shouted at her son now, parting her lips to grab feverishly at his withers. She bit down as hard as she could. Shamwari cried at the acute sense of pain and lifted his head, ears laced back against his poll. "You have two choices: Either waste away here and die with her, leaving you son to be an orphan. Or get the fuck up and move on with your life, which you know is what she'd want you to do." She spat at him, the wavy strands of her blonde tail whisking over her haunches. "I'm not going to coddle you Shamwari. This is life. You know better. But she's gone and I didn't raise you to give up so easily. Get up and go be a father to your mother-less son."
"Jesus Evaline." Paradiso spat, watching Shamwari who at least was holding his head up now, the most movement he'd seen out of him since he arrived here. Shamwari looked angry now, his ears still pinned, but his gaze was blank, staring out into the sea. Sand clung to the red hairs along his jawline.
Evaline knew she was harsh. But the golden mare had never sugarcoated anything for anyone, especially her bastard son. There was a small inkling in her gut that felt pain for him. She knew this was hard for him. But this was the only way Evaline knew how to be a mother. She had to get him up and moving again.
17 | Arabian cross |14.2 | Palomino | Mother of Kasabian, Shamwari, Vita Nova, Paradiso, Ruxin & Talya | Vinyl |