Meadow

as I wandered the forest, the green leaves among, i heard a wild flower singing a song

the thought of shamwari’s disappointment hadn’t ever really crossed her mind… she thought he would probably just be glad. glad to be rid of her…. to have her away from his son. he would probably feel that sweet vindication of being right all along, that she knew, but she wouldn’t have dreamed to rob him of it by staying. he was right after all, she was true to her roots.

the pale fae of a mare rested silently, her sides barely rising and falling as she drew in quiet breaths. her deep blue eyes had closed, long rust and ivory colored lashes laying delicately across her chiseled cheeks. she is in and out of sleep, needing the rest but too uneasy to truly let herself drift too deeply. when the steady thud of hoofbeats grows closer she is jolted from that state, snapping to attention. her eyes bloom open and she takes a deep breath, velvety muzzle drawing in the crisp air. shock barely registers when she realizes it is the large red form of shamwari who thunders towards her. she feels a brief moment of relief, eagerness even, at seeing his familiar form…. she wishes she knew the words to use, what to say to make things right between them. she would give so much to have their friendship back… but she extinguishes this hope, lowering her small maw, which she had extended thinking to offer some form greeting. even if she knew what she could say to fix them… she didn’t think that was what he would want anyway. her only hope now is that she can somehow salvage her relationship with jabari… her relief that it was him and not the threat of another stallion stutters when she takes note of this expression…outwardly angry and stormy. she shrinks into herself, as she is so used to doing, and nearly cringes as he draws near.

his words are so sharp she feels them cut her… the disgust and irritation that he must have always felt but kept somewhat covered has been laid bare. tears well in her blue eyes, even though he has not said anything outwardly mean… everything is just so broken. she draws in a short breath hearing him ask about dahlia, feeling a crippling sensation of worry sinking deep in her stomach. she ignores his last statement, not necessarily on purpose, to ask about her daughter. dahlia left? i… i thought she might. but not so soon. she had known for some time that dahlia would likely leave the prairie but she hadn’t guessed it would be so soon… she was barely grown.

she tries to push this worry away, knowing that there was nothing she could have done except maybe have gone with the filly anyway… then she would have been leaving daphne behind.. there was no way for her to win. she would find dahlia and make sure she was safe in time… she turns her attention back to the tall red stallion before her, trying to gather her thoughts… his words were true enough. they hadn’t been friendly. she had offered apology after apology and been unable to make anything better. she had only intended to leave for a while, why would she stay when jabari wasn’t there? her daughters were nearly grown… they didn’t need her so much anymore… she just needed a break, someone to talk to. and she was so glad she had reached out to vita nova. it reassured her that she just needed time but that it was worth returning to the prairie and to talk to jabari. the disdain shamwari has for her and her failure to stay is evident….clearly he hadn’t expected or knew of her plan to return… what did he care if she left? or maybe she wasn’t free to come and go as she thought the arrangement had once been…. he had never indicated he would force her to stay if it was against her will… but eyeing him now, the hard cold expression, maybe things had changed… her tone is meek, as broken as she feels. i thought you would be pleased to have me gone…