Meadow

sleep had struggled to find her and when it did, it was fitful. for so long, it seemed, she had closed her eyes while her mind struggled to find the quiet nothingness it required to drift off…

her thoughts roiled and spilled turbulently, from her family and the prairie, to the sweet friendship of ramiel, her time spent at the ridge with bjorn, to the brooding ramiel. there was a small measure excitement for tomorrow… she anticipated traveling back to the prairie, hoping that her assumptions were correct and that she would find her mother there and be reunited with daphne. it seemed so unlikely to have caught both the scent of her mother and grandfather in one place… for as practical as she was, she harbored a desperate childish wish that the pair had made their peace…

she was also somewhat nervous. would her sister forgive her? she had given daphne no notice of her departure other than a quiet kiss in the darkness… disappearing just as their mother had. at the time she thought that would be easiest for them both, but looking back it caused an ugly blossom of guilt in her chest.

the little mare is also sad because heading back to the prairie in the morning would mean saying goodbye the pair of brothers at her side. ramiel had embraced her so full-heartedly that she couldn’t help but fear the end of their friendship though it had only spanned one day.

she wasn’t as reluctant to part ways with the quiet broodier stallion… in fact, she looked forward to relieving him of the burden of helping her… the more she turned over their interactions in her mind the more she concluded that perhaps much of his sourness was somehow her fault… she had delayed them when clearly all he was intent on was leaving. it reminded her of the time, as fillies, her sister had dragged her to the edge of the prairie to meet another filly who had wandered in from the border of the forest. dahlia had sulked the whole time, mainly concerned with keeping daphne from getting into trouble and getting back to their shore-side thicket of seagrass.

she dreams of that small hollow shelter of tall grass, empty and grey without the warm bodies of her mother and sister, before startling awake. dahlia’s soft dark eyes blink open, adjusting to the starlight she is bathed in. ramiel still sleeps a short distance away from her, she sees, but the pale brother raziel is gone. with timid hesitating steps the small palomino mare wanders some feet further into the common, her delicate head raised cautiously. where had he gone?

she wishes she could go back to ramiel’s side and drift back into slumber, forgetting raziel’s absence but she can’t help a feeling of bubbling guilt that wells up in her heart. she was likely the only reason they hesitated here on the isle’s when he was so clearly eager to leave. though she doubts he would accept her apology, she still knows she’ll be unable to rest until she delivers it.

she wanders hopefully, weaving through the dark trees in a similar direction they had come from this morning, though she’s not certain it is the same trail. equal parts of dread and eager anticipation well up in her heart as her hooves carry her further. the girlish curiosity she initially harbored for the quiet brother causes a soft flutter of anxiety… for some reason she is reminded of the feeling of bjorn tracing his muzzle across the curve of her back and the warmth of his pale eyes…. why was it that she would feel that same warm flutter of nerves when thinking of raziel when he seemed intent to dislike her.

she hesitates then, when her brown eyes finally spy a patch of pale hide some distance ahead, the feeling of those butterflies replaced with apprehension at approaching him… she feels flushed and embarrassed suddenly… she knew it was unlikely she would be able to offer an apology that would change his opinion of her, but just minutes ago she felt so determined to try… she digs deeply for courage then, ready to bear the brunt of his rejection, and finally is able to free her body and move forward again.

as she approaches, dahlia sees the way he gazes wistfully into the open meadow, oblivious to her for the moment. she hates to disturb him, musing to herself that this is the most content he had seemed all day. it’s too late to turn back now however, so she clears her throat softly…not wishing to startle him.

though her honey gold coat is bathed in starlight and her mane and tail glow softly in the same ethereal way as he dam’s, dahlia still feels ashamed at her appearance. she tips her face away from him shyly, hiding her mild disfigurement, and stands some distance away. the barrier he builds around himself is nearly palpable. her voice is soft and apologetic as she speaks through the night to him. ”i’m sorry…. i noticed you had woken and just thought…. well, i wanted to apologize for keeping you today… i didn’t mean to take so much of your time.”