I missed him every time he was away from me. His touch never failed to warm me, and even now I leaned into his caress. I did not fear his touch or seek to distance myself from him. Even when Rigel had told me of Min's fire in men, and the risks of coupling too often, it was not Antares that I feared.

It was my own self-control that I doubted. For days after we had first met, we did not extricate from one another's embrace except for when it was absolutely necessary. He was mine, and I was so eager to taste and touch of him that I simply could not have enough. Only Rigel's teaching gave me to tools to slow the ardent affairs of my husband, to find other ways in which I might bring him pleasure so that my denial of his heat inside of me would not bring him heartache.

In truth, the knowledge that a month still remained of the Fall season had lead me to soften toward a Lesser Wife, out of compassion for him. I did not want one for myself yet. I still could not fully understand how I might come to love them, or how they would be any different to my sire's concubines, but I desperately wanted him to be happy. And if there might yet be a mare out there that would be able to dampen the fires that I could no longer tend, I wanted him to have her.

He murmurs a soft assurance to me and I smile, allowing my own voice to murmur into the still air. "I never fear you, my beloved."

I listen to the beginning of his story with a smile, pleased to know that my family are ardent protectors of the Dunes. It was a strange concept to me, to know that my beloved, a true prince, did not rule the Dunes himself, but I was adjusting. In truth, I did not mind so much. Maslakhat was kind, if mysterious and a little frightening, and they seemed to work together well. I had seen the golden bay with his own contingent of mares, so I did not think he was bereft of company either.

In the water, I let my love speak while I rinse water over his sand dusted form. He is not so dirty as I implied, but it is a wonderful excuse to touch him chastely, and lovingly. Knowing that I can raise his desire with a simple change in how I touch him feels powerful, but I do not wield this sword tonight. I will not rile him and leave him wanting, for that is a cruel way to live as his wife.

He mentions that a stallion and a mare have come to visit, and while an ear flicks toward him, I don't flinch at the implication. The steady stream of mares to our home had lulled me into a false sense of security as he remained impassive in the face of each. I know my jealousy is selfish, but I stoutly believe that no mare with a heart could have Antares and wish to share him with any other. Eventually, I will need to relent, or at least swallow it so that it is my own personal torture and not one that he must bear. For now, I still allow him glimpses of my envy, the way I pressed teeth to his skin at the meeting of Eness and Sakhmet, and the way my lips pursed as he spoke too fondly of any of them.

I untangle the wild ruby strands of his mane as he talks, although the name Bahadir makes me pause. Bahadir was here? Why? He had abandoned us months past, after deserting us all in the Badlands in his shame. Surely he had not come back for the Dunes? I barely acknowledge the mare's name, having never heard of Bhaskara before. "I did not think he would return, after his loss."

I offer the words softly, their tone regretful in a way. I had never formally met the bay stallion, and in truth, I still felt slighted by him, although it was through no fault of his own. When Naz had rescued me from the Commons, I had simply assumed that Bahadir would come to me. Of course, he would. I was a princess, of noble blood and breeding, beautiful and beloved by her people. But he had not. And the longer he avoided calling me out, the more stubbornly I stayed away. It had helped, I think, in my choice to remain pure for my husband, and had rubbed some of my entitlement off, but I still had mixed feelings on the whole ordeal.

"I was once a part of his herd, although it was to my dearest Naz that my loyalty lay. I wonder what it is that has brought him back," I murmur into my beloved's mane. Naz would be happy to hear of him, I thought, although I knew her loyalty to be pulled in another direction as well. I would have to tell her the news, for I held no faith that Bahadir would have sought her out.

He goes on to speak of Rigel's found mare and I press a smile into the shoulder of Antares. I was certain that Rigel, the man of many words, would be all too happy to regale the mare with more tails. I make a mental note to go check on her, later, to see if she might be a match for my galaxy coated brother. "I am sure he enjoyed the attention, and perhaps he can find a commonality with her in his stories. It will save us from hearing them again."

My tone is soft but wickedly playful and I laugh against his body as I continue bathing him. The tone grows more serious as he brings up my proposed venture to the Crossing and I sober, noting the deep concern in his voice. I stay quiet for a moment, finishing the side I am on before moving to the opposite to begin the same process. After a moment I speak again, "I think Rigel wore the bruises slightly longer than necessary, my love. It was not his fault that I sought Naz."

I had not yet discussed this with him, and in truth, was not sure that it was necessarily the right time. "So much had changed so quickly for me, my love. And I had just wanted one person who had known me before you to give me the perspective I needed so that I could appreciate all of my good fortune."

I smile slightly, knowing that this was only part of the truth. I had needed Naz's perspective so that I would not feel so shocked by the things that Rigel was telling me. "That, and we..." I consider the words that I offer carefully. "We both came with certain notions of our cultures, and let our pride speak before our hearts for a moment."

In truth, as I recall that situation, I remember the heartsickness that had gripped me as I'd listened to the purpose of a Min Priestess and even now felt my heart break anew for him. "Some things were, and still are, hard for me to accept."

Lazily, I rest my pale chin across his strong back and rest for just a moment, taking my comfort from his nearness. "Miayat sanat ln takun alwaqt alkafi 'iilaa janibik."