i was trying to die last night [TW] IP: 73.173.166.255 Posted on January 6, 2021 at 00:46:42 AM by Calwyn
He felt like he floating, through empty space and bliss. His body was light and his head was airy. There was the unmistakable feeling that his mind and all the thoughts attached to it were spilling out of his skull, effusing through the atmosphere like unrestrained gas. A warm sensation crept over him. His body flopped and bent like a marionette, thrown about by the whim of the winds that buoyed him, but he was numb to it, detached almost. He was shedding his mortal vessel and the feeling was pleasant. The deed had been done. He’d given himself over to death and it had taken him warmly. That is, until it didn’t.
Surviving his own suicide was not a situation Calwyn had planned for, but when he opened his bright blue eyes, he reeled at the sunlight and within seconds the burning spread from his vision to his stomach. He released the searing bile surging up his throat with a loud gag, expelling a dozen home-pressed fentanyl pills from his system. They sizzled in the grass for a moment before they began to burn up, disappearing before his eyes as if they never had existed.
He bent over in the grass, on his hands and knees, heaving in dramatic fashion as spit and vomit clung to his chin. Calwyn pushed himself up but didn’t leave his knees. He forced his gaze away from the spot where the pills had been and examined the rest of his body.
His fingernails were long and dirty, still coated in chipped red polish. His pale skin was tattooed from his knuckles up and he assumed his face was much the same. He ran a hand through the hair on his head and again assumed that it was as blonde as it had ever been. All of it seem the same except, that is, for the place.
When he last closed his eyes, he had been laying in his bathtub, drunk from a pint of cheap vodka and all the pills he’d taken. Now, he was here, far beyond what seemed like the mundane trappings of his Manhattan hotel room. With all of the strange events that pervaded his life before this, he should have known that things would take a turn for the unusual. Calwyn, a veritable ghost in the real world, would not be privileged to indulge in death the same way all others around him were able. He had always been different and here, after “death”, that had not seemed to change…
Character Name: Calwyn
Biological Sex: Male
Hair Color: Blonde, bbRR
Eye: Blue, bbgg
Skin tone: pale white, covered in tattoos of various colors
Wing Appearance: Bedraggled and tattered, Calwyn’s wings fall around him like black streamers tinged with the myriad of colors common to a fire opal. In the right lighting, Calwyn’s wings shimmer with a brilliant array of oranges, reds, greens, and blues, but faced head on, appear as black as raven wings.
Physical & Neuro-Diversity: Calwyn is an addict, in all regards. Whether its drugs, fame, women, money, or music, Calwyn operates with an obsessive compulsion to pursue whatever it is that is making him happy at the moment. This incessant desire to pursue the things he wants often results in his depression, as such things rarely live up to his ideals regarding them. When Calwyn is not existing in a depressive state, he is generally affable and prefers music to all else.
Player Name: Dan
How I found Shaman: Dema
Replies:
accepted! - By AspeltaJanuary 6, 2021 at 01:26:04 AM