Desert

Though the Desert was hot during the day, even in winter, the nights were cold year round. Cerosi knew it was her time when she awoke in the dark, sweating, her body uncomfortably hot despite the cool air. It was difficult to keep from panicking as she rose shakily to her feet and ambled off into the night, even farther away from the herd than she usually stayed.

The steel gray mare whimpered as she paced through the sand, the grains bathed in moonlight and silvery. Her own body was a similar bright and ghostly silver, her pale mane and tail seeming to glow, hiding the dark patches of nervous sweat on her neck and hindquarters. Her tail snapped anxiously against her sides, and she wore a circle into the dry ground before long.

Finally, the first of her true contractions came, and Cerosi cried out in alarm and pain. Furious, she bit her tongue, cursing herself for advertising herself and her vulnerability, but there was nothing she could do about it now. She might have gone back to seek out Cain, but at that moment her knees buckled and she collapsed in a cloud of silvery dust. It might have been from the pain, but most likely it was from overwhelming fear. She regretted trying to do this alone, and as another contraction gripped her belly, she cried out again in spite of herself.

She knew she was supposed to push. She knew she was supposed to just do as her body demanded, but Cerosi could not bring herself to obey. Whimpering, she panted into the sandy earth, sending little dusty clouds billowing across the ground at her nose. Once this child was born, who knew what would happen? She couldn’t take care of a foal. She could hardly take care of herself.

After what felt like hours, Cerosi lay exhausted in the dust. She had involuntarily kicked out her legs enough to carve little ditches in the ground at her hooves. She could no longer fight it - this baby was coming whether she wanted it or not. Cerosi closed her eyes. She did not try to push, but she stopped trying to hold back, and just shut down for the process to finish itself. She let her mind wander as her muscles instinctively took over. It felt like hours before she finally returned to herself, and when she did, her body was still.

She was so sore, and so tired. Cerosi groaned. She lifted her head gingerly, her eyes dull with exhaustion, and saw that a silver foal lay in a wet bundle at her hindquarters. Cerosi stirred, still a bit dissociated, and rose. She shook herself and turned to examine the child, waiting for the rush of hormones to make everything okay again, but no such luck. It wasn’t that she felt nothing - she cleaned the child’s fuzzy little body with gentleness and care - but she still felt fearful and wrong. Still, maybe it wasn’t so bad. She nudged the filly and encouraged her to nurse, giving her time to do so before very tiredly guiding her back to the herd.

Cerosi

mare // 4 // EE aa Dd nRb ZZ // 15hh