OOC: TW mentions of SA

She does not have to wait long for him; she never does. While her sisters experience lovers that abandon them, or leave them for long months at a time, Kohelet has never once gone without Fell's presence. Even her capture in the Badlands had simply been a game of waiting it out, as she knew that she could count on Fell to come for her, as if they were bound together by more than just her words.

Perhaps that is why she had dragged her hooves for so long, fighting against the possibility that Rafe was right. She felt guilty already, angry with herself for doubting Fell enough for this to even be a thing, for her to even consider it a possibility.

But she could not lie to herself.

As much as Fell was a gentle and kind lover, a devoted and attentive father, an intelligent and shrewd leader... he was also still Rougaru's son. And while Kohelet had - for years - denied that such a thing mattered to her, she could not also deny that a part of Fell was wild, and harsh, and cruel, too. That sometimes, there was more beast than man in those golden eyes she so adored, too wild for even her to ever tame.

She had seen him bring home mares that wanted nothing to do with him. Had heard Maeve's disgust, Kolfinna's fear, and Azalais' (initial) grumbling. Just as she had seen Maizel and Mrgasira and Blue fall for him, in their own ways. It was an infuriating fence to walk along, and she hated how impotent it made her feel. It was her duty to protect this herd, to keep them safe, and while Viveka might never have been a part of the Bay herd, she still felt like she had failed her somehow.

If it were true. If, she kept reminding herself, as if the suspicions of the tale's veracity hadn't chased her in her dreams every night. If only she'd been more for Fell, offered herself as the wall against which that beast might crash and crash and crash until its energy was expended. Perhaps then she wouldn't be here, dreading and eagerly anticipating his arrival in equal measure.

Fear or no fear, his arrival heralds a smile that breaks softly across her lips and she returns the silent greeting; then closes the distance between them to brush their muzzles together before stepping back. As he can sense her tension, so can she his. It hurts her heart for him to stand separate from her like this, but she cannot bring herself to close the distance, knowing it would only make this conversation harder.

"I wanted to ask you about something I heard while I was in the Badlands," she began, intentionally leaving out mention of Rafe's name lest it cause a reaction on its own. "About a black mare, with a silver mane and tail. A-and, her s-son." The words did not spill from her lips smoothly, all full of starts and stops and tiny tremors. Her gaze remained locked on his face, still terrified of what indicators she might find there. "Is her story... is it true? Did you-" She paused to swallow, something the core of steel down deep in her chest that her mother had given her. "Did you for-?"

She can't even get the word out, the tears - brought on by fear of the truth, of losing him, of losing everything - welled by did not fall from her eyes, and she let the implication hang heavily in the air between them, waiting to be answered.