[ mhr gha SEER ah ]
Fell
▻ Sarama | Shvana ◅
What was it about grief for loss that made one want to be a loss to others, she wondered. What was it about losing someone that made your spirit weak at the sight of mortality, or even the flimsy reality of presence. She feels ashamed for her actions, but when she’d determined herself able to live through it after much mental and emotional toil - she finds that she isn't so tolerant of the same weakness in the one that was supposed to be stronger than herself. It wasn’t about the grieving, it was about the healing… or rather, the lack thereof.
So she expells her thoughts in the torrent he’d not been expecting. He seems to listen, his whole body screaming apology - opening her heart back up from the hurt like acknowledging her truth was a sun to a flower once put to sleep by frost. She was a strong little thing beneath the shell of her upbringing, resilient like her mother who had survived being born a sacrifice to her people’s gods… blind and so expendable. To live through that, or in her own case the death of a child, made her stronger and more surefooted on the grounds of reality.
He is sorry and it means she might come nearer, be nearer, and give him the soft touch of her own kind of ‘sorry’. He chews, she chews. They are both flawed and each one is made to realize it for themselves and of each other. It is at least healing for her - she tells him that his nip still smarted. His lip smooths along it and it brings her to lean against him in relief. The tender touch was enough to erase any tension or blame, once again transforming her into the familiar and gentled natured mare that she’d ever been before. The swirling touch brings the side of her lip against his own side absentmindedly, small rubbing scrape of returned affection bringing a deep sigh from her.
The world felt, well, not righted - a child was dead - but mended. Something about his support brought an end to the wild agony and the rampant accusation and the sour childishness that his absence had allowed to formerly fester in. Like the burst of an abscess, the relief for her is instant - even if the wound itself would take a bit more time to heal.
OF THE TINUVEL BAY
▻ five years - arabian x kathiawari - maximum chestnut sabino - 14.2 hh ◅