No one expects an
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This birth had hurt worse than any of the others, though only in part to the birth itself. Ivo had not arrived quickly, or quietly, or with grace. Nor, really, with any patience. When he had decided he was finally ready to meet the world, all Kohelet had been able to do was hold on and do her best to keep him safe beneath the absent light of the new moon. Every tiny thing about him reminded her of Fell, although she had no guarantee that Fell was his sire. The attitude, the impatience, the way he curled close against her, with no regard for her personal space or comfort.
When all was said and done, and the wobbly-legged newborn had dried and drank his fill, Kohelet kept silent vigil over him as the dawn came and revealed to her what she already knew... Ivo was a tiny clone of his sire, all the way down to the minuscule inward curve of his oversized ear tips. She watched him for hours that first morning, and cried for hours after, recognizing the danger of his existence.
She did her best in the days since to keep both Ivo and Amalia out of everyone's sight, without giving any of them a reason to check on her. She stayed away from the borders and beaches, and fed in the early morning hours when the children's bickering was least likely to be noticed. The constant hours with only two young children for company, however, were wearing thin. She missed the companionship that came with a herd, and her heart ached painfully for the life she'd once had in the Bay. It was as if being near Fell again had reawakened every fiber of her being that loved him, sins included. He had seemed different, as if he'd grown and been trying to fix his life.
Perhaps that was all wishful thinking. It was as though they had talked that night. In truth, she hadn't even been entirely certain it wasn't a dream until Ivo had arrived, the spitting image of his father. Even then, there was still a possibility that Quinn was his father, which still made her sick to her stomach. She had avoided him religiously since that day, making sure to keep her children well beyond his reach lest he prove good on his implied threats.
The noonday sun was warm on her back as she edged away from where Amalia and Ivo were napping, for once at peace with one another. It was wishful thinking to assume she'd find some wanderer brave enough to stride into Nyimara's lands, but she was desperate for some sort of adult conversation that didn't carry threats laced into every smile. Her gaze skimmed the horizon before loosing a quiet call, offering companionship if anyone were close enough to hear it.