She does not regret retreating from the Badlands when her due date with Aesara grew near. Perhaps it was not the most sound decision, leaving Raegar to hold their ancestral lands alone, but…things had been quiet. So quiet, in fact, that Arsinoe wonders if their father hadn’t been some sort of beacon for trouble. He’d ruffled enough feathers in his time, accumulated enemies all over the island and it seems that the Badlands were endlessly embroiled in some scuffle or other as a result of him in particular.

In the end, it doesn’t matter. Raegar has shown himself more than capable in a fight – and surely he will not blunder the politics of Salem in the time it takes her to give birth and nurse her impulse-foal to strength.

This, at least, is the mantra she repeated over and over to herself as she departed for greener, easier lands – tucked away in the lush green of the Meadow, hiding from sight, Arsinoe gave birth to a beautiful daughter. There seems to be nothing of Asmodeus in her, none of that ego-driven would be kind, and Arsinoe is relieved. After Vadim and Sarama left her, she wasn’t in a good place. Worse even, perhaps, than when Khan left her behind. At least then she had the balm of other young siblings to soothe her soul - Raegar to chase down or Eloisa to tease. But with Vadim and Sarama gone, and no one left to call her own she…spiraled, if she’s being honest with herself.

But that was in the Spring, and now Autumn draws near again. Her daughter is strong enough to make the swim back to Salem, and Arsinoe feels settled enough to face a life so changed from what she wanted - Vadim and Sarama, her family safe in the Badlands, someday ruling all of Salem - and so changed from her abrupt recalibration when Rafe went missing. Ruling at Sakir’s side, choosing to take the olive branch he offered got her and Raegar a chance to remain in their home and quickly retake it. But it also lost the closest thing she had ever had to a partner before.

Their departure is still a wound in her chest, poorly healed, the ache still ever-present and deep. Sometimes, she isn’t even sure if she truly loved Vadim – perhaps he was just the first thing wholly hers, that she chose for herself and saw a future with. Was it love? Or was he an imperfect representation made flesh of all of her deepest wishes? The tighter she grasped, the more she tried to do right by him, the further he fled. In the end, she was left alone with nothing to her name - not Vadim, not the Badlands, not even her eldest daughter, sent away to the Hills for her safety.

Part of the reason for finally returning is the fear that she will run across him or one of his merry band of snotty mares seeking respite during the fall. But Salem – Salem is safe. Salem has always been her domain, and Vadim would not visit if he wasn’t seeking her out. So she rouses Aesara from her sleep when the first rays of dawn peek over the horizon, and they set out. They move south down the coast until they reach the Lagoon and set out from there, rather than try and brave more of a swim. Her daughter is strong, but Arsinoe sees no need to risk her life.

When they come ashore, she glances around in confusion for a moment, and then pins her ears in annoyance. They’d drifted further east than she had planned, and instead of arriving safely in their home, she’s managed to deliver them right to Asmodeus’ doorstep. Arsinoe isn’t sure who she is less excited to see – him, or Xafira who was justifiably annoyed at their last meeting that her trek over to the Desert, her attempt to join the herd here, was all pointless, duplicated effort if Arsinoe was just going to buy them a tie to him by blood.

Well, either way they aren’t staying here to find out who comes sniffing around first. It isn’t far to the Badlands border from here. With a quiet huff and another cautious glance around the horizon, Arsinoe shoos Aesara west, towards home. If she has any bit of luck, they’ll reach the Badlands before anyone knows that they were even here.