Shenzi was still wild with adrenalin when she broke away from Nyimara. There was an unspoken understanding between them that she had won, but instead of a rush of pride or power, it only left her feeling hollow. The scarred barb mare stopped some paces away, chest heaving, glaring out toward the horizon. Realizing what she had done, some cold tendril of dread unfurled inside her. No-one would want her here, after this, least of all Nyimara.

And that freedom Shenzi had fought for? It felt like a tangle of vines around her neck.  

She considered just leaving now that it was over, maybe it would hurt less that way, but then Nyimara’s voice carried to her across the sand, on the wind. Shenzi pinned her ears, twisting back to look over her shoulder.  “It has never been my nature to talk,” came the husky snarl. At least, not about things that made her vulnerable. How she felt, and what she was afraid of.

If nothing else, she had hoped that the clash between them would remind her who she really was, and help Nyimara see her more clearly, but that was perhaps too much to hope for. Shenzi certainly still felt untethered, a shadow of who she had been, or who she could be. “Fighting for what I want is all I know.” At least that much remained true.

“Maybe we did,” Shenzi relented, her posture losing some of the tension that had seized her. It was a few moments before she finished her thought. “Lose sight of one another.” The words felt heavy and bitter on her tongue as she spoke them, and feeling her heart twist in her chest, she turned her face away and looked out over the sands of the Desert. How many years had she roamed Salem? Almost too many to count. “I couldn’t let go of the children I’ve lost, and you…” Her throat felt tight, and her ears tilted back.

No matter what she felt, she could not bring herself to speak against the mare before her, who she had known long before she’d established her reign as Queen of the Desert.

The fierce brown mare had loved and lost so much in that time, and Nyimara alone had remained. Perhaps in days to come, Shenzi would grieve over what might have been, but right now, she was still so torn, her heart and her teeth wanting more. And when Nyimara spoke again, the barb mare snapped. “What makes you think I need your protection?” There had been a time when she’d been weak and wounded, fading away. But she’d recovered from that, had borne a healthy son in the time since. The idea that Nyimara saw her still as that helpless creature on the verge of death, so world-weary and empty…

“That’s not what I came back for,” she uttered, “That’s not why I remained here with you. I wanted-” But Shenzi caught herself, breaking off with a sharp shake of her head, jaw clenched. “I know you never meant it to feel like a chain,” she continued, softer still, the words barely more than a whisper. 

And yet, in some way that Shenzi couldn't bring herself to speak of, it had been.

And it was still.