I'm beginning to feel like a Dungeon Dragon

soul forever her own | heart captured by none | Hastati for Glorall | no children |

She had bigger things to worry about than just herself. She had a pack now. A sister, a pupil, a little brother, a rank. She was a Hastati, an elite warrior and the frontline of defense for the pack. She wouldn't put all that in jeopardy just for the sake of one wolf. She would not kill him, could not. Chicky would disown her probably, Nootau would run from her -hell, he didn't like her killing the lynx that would've eaten him- Tesseract would probably kick her out and stop Viora's training under her. She would not lose her first home since she left her birth-pack. She would not lose her rank, nor her family. She had something bigger than herself to take care of. If it was just her as it had been most of her life, she would've have killed him by now. Or at least wound him grievously. Yes, that was what she would do, not go to him or acknowledge that she'd missed him, somewhere deep down in the place she'd thought she walled off long ago. She continued to pace, growling under her breath, snapping her fangs in the air in anger.

She needed to be calm. She needed to get a grip on her emotions. Normally, she didn't have such a short fuse. Normally, she could control her anger. But this was no a normal circumstance. She thought she was rid of the merle bastard but noooo, he had to follow her. Why was he so determined? Really? What was so attractive about her? She wasn't that tall, she was rather stocky, she was scarred. She was rather plain to look at. She would rather brawl and explore than sit home and take care of pups and a mate. She fought better than anything else she did. She could look after pups if she had to, but she didn't really know how to.

"As if I'd tell you!" She snaps, not wanting him anywhere near her Nootau. The little teenager got teary eyed over a lynx that tried to make him lunch, she didn't know how he'd fair with a jealous male twice his size. Wait. Jealous? She stopped, looking at him with a confused scowl. The hell? Why was he jealous? His next words made her freeze, panic alighting her expression for split seconds before she crushed it. Dammit, she didn't! She was the shoulder for everyone else, she didn't need one of her own, no matter what happened. She didn't, she didn't, she didn't. "I'm the shoulder for everyone else. I don't need one of my own." She let him in on some of her mentality, not knowing she just revealed most of her thinking when it came to others and her worth.

Oh but she did. No matter what she told herself, sometimes she just couldn't keep it all bottled inside. But she'd be damned if she revealed this to anyone. She was just beginning to think of venting to Chicky, she didn't want to dump all her emotional baggage on the poor female all at once. She saw the look on his face and despite herself, she liked it. She had never seen that other side of him, didn't know he was a warrior like she. She snarled back, mirroring his, before she started pacing again, not caring that she showed him her back when she turned. Until his words stopped her once more."Of course I traveled alone then! I just met them! Don't you know you don't have to be blood to be family?!" She revealed to him, showing him a bit more of her mentality. She was an only pup, but she had many pseudo-siblings across the globe. "Is it so bad that I'm close enough friends with someone to consider them family?" She asked snidely.

Contrary to his belief, no one shared her den. They couldn't, hers was just big enough for her to turn around in. She wouldn't take a bigger den when she didn't need it. She was flexible enough; she could fold herself into it fine. Another instance of her thinking that everyone was more important than she was. She may be a Hastati, but she was still disposable. She would pull her weight and then some, would do whatever jobs that needed to be done, even if some would consider them "below" her.

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