It's an odd feeling and I'm not altogether sure I like it. I know this feeling from before but it still feels foreign to me. I felt it once before when introduced to a female named Chickadee but she disappeared soon after and I never saw her again. At first it ached something fierce but over time it faded and altogether disappeared and I felt whole again, or at least as whole as I'll ever feel after losing Rose. And yet the moment my bright blue gaze falls on the white form of the wolf with blood on her jaws offering another female some food, something in me shifts.
The sensation has my entire body rippling with aniticipation even though I don't know what I'm supposed to be anticipating. I can see that she's got no interest in me or the other wolves, only the one beside her who she seems to want to protect. She's already got a nice juicy calf at her feet, ready for eating but I'm less interested in that meat than I'll ever be. Besides, it's not what's on my menu ever. Instead I'm engrossed by her. The pearly white of her coat so much like her own, even the ice blue gaze she has that matches my own. It's like looking at a tougher version of Rose and it tears my heart out all over again. It's like finding her alive when I thought her dead though I would know just from the perfume that this is not Rose. Nothing could ever match her perfume but this is something...different.
The female talks to another, inviting her to eat and I find myself tilting my head, intrigued. I want to venture closer, to see her face to face, perhaps to touch her. The thought alone makes my fur bristle with satisfaction. It's like my very soul is aching for contact but I have no soul. What is this trickery? I'm instantly suspicious of it. Instead of going toward her, I turn the other way, abolishing her perfection from my sight even though I ache to look back. I start walking away, even knowing that my path is curved and really I'm just circling the clearing to come around behind her where I'll only be closer to her.
I crouch down once I can smell her better, simply staring through the bushes as I try to figure her out. Finally I take off at a dead run, sure that I can outrun this treachery. Soon enough night falls and I'm restless. I know why but I'm fighting it. Finally I give in and start tracking her scent, knowing that I don't even have to follow the usual signs to get to her. Somehow I just know where she'll be. And so I hunt.
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əric
so just bite me baby
and drink all my blood
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