It is uncomfortable being around her after having been so long isolated. I had grown fond of the shadows that slid through my darker fur. The white on my chest even now was muddied, a mix between gray and brown from all the dirt and grime that still clung to me. Bathing wasn’t a luxury I could afford when I tried to conceal my very presence. My family might despise me, I think, but I also knew they were fiercely loyal. If any of them knew I was still in Molodian they would come hunt me down and give me a tongue lashing or worse, beg me to return to the fold. I didn’t have it in me to break their hearts again. It hurt too much the first time.

I am struck again by her loveliness as I pause in my words, worried eyes darting across her face-mask and mis-matched eyes. We barely knew each other yet I felt a sense of pureness from her. It was altogether different from the oily feeling I had been surrounded with my whole life. I’m hit with the thought that I probably stink and.. yes, there definitely was a smell here in the cave, but I couldn’t tell if it was me or her. I had become accustomed to the smell. From her all I got was freshness, freedom.

She is quiet while I talk but it doesn’t take long before she starts questioning me. My ears fold back slightly against her words, the accusing tone of her voice. ”They did,” I try to intercede. If anything, I knew my parents weren’t responsible for this. Back then, as a pup, I had accused them, cut them down with my angry words, but I understood it now. I understood their helplessness. I growl low in my throat, frustrated, as she speaks because she doesn’t understand the gravity of it. The growl fades as I look at her again, with new eyes, realizing suddenly that Reine has been on her own too, just not because she wanted to be.

I felt like shit. Then I shrugged it off, annoyed with myself: I didn’t have time to feel bad for the time I wasted hiding. That wasn’t a luxury I had when darkness was literally at our doorstep. ”I’m sorry that your family is gone Reine,” I say, before continuing, “but I think you need to get back to Spirane and stay there. It is safer in a pack than in the free lands” I begin to pace back and forth, my stalwart figure large in such an enclosed space. ”He is wily and he was pissed when I ran off and escaped him. He would hurt you just to hurt me.” I pause, my burning emerald eyes turning back to her. ”You are my imprint, soul of my soul, I know you feel it too. I don’t know what else that means but I do know that if he knew, he would target you to get to me. It’s what a smart wolf would do.” It is what I would do, I think, but I don’t say that because I think she might not want to hear that. Likely she wouldn’t feel safe with me if I said it. It wasn’t right, but it was truth.

”What were you doing out there by yourself anyways?” The question isn’t said in an angry voice, just sort of bewildered. I know why I hid away, but why wasn’t a pack wolf with her pack?