Aster

I should not go to him. Part of me thinks it feeds into whatever imagination that Elohim has thought up. Even if he seemed to think he was unimaginative. Wasn't it imaginative cruelty to make Halcyon bring me meals after my birth? Meals caught by Elohim? True, it had not lasted long before Halcyon had become ill once more and I knew what he thought. That Halcyon was weak and ill suited to me. I knew it now because I understood better the motivation behind Elohim. Why he had always stuck by me even when he made me face the cruel truths. When he forced me to face facts head on. He had a scar on him because of me. Yet here I was, calling for him, relying on him, because inside, past all those questions and uncertainty, I knew I could rely on him as I relied on Halcyon.

It seemed the darkness would always be our time to meet. Memories of shadows, twisted words, emotional encounters. We are such vastly difference creatures but I think that beneath that cool veneer Elohim is a furious beast of wildfire like myself. He has Eden in him which cools that temperament. My feud with Eden was pretty much laid to bed with the loss of Asteraia. At the moment I could care less about the seaside pack. He was still a King and I was a pauper, begging for scraps. I guess he won and all he had to do was wait. Failure hung around me like a shroud.

When he comes striding towards me, it is without complaint, without comment and with comfort. The moment that he offers his shoulder, I press forward and lean mine into his, tucking my head into my chest in an instinctive curl as the weight of everything I carried pressed down on me. I did not fear Elohim. He had never hurt me, even when I hurt him, and here he was offering me some sort of solace. After everything I have said to him. Done to him.

I close my eyes, grit my teeth, then step back so that I can face him. "I bet you've heard, haven't you?" It is the only question I can ask and it falls flat. Dead from my lips with an air of defeat. I remember when we first met in Glorall. My fire, my rants, his calm and poise. Now I am wilted once more before him. How fast my fire always burns out. But it will always flare up again.

As it does now, when suddenly my ears snap back and I begin to pace in front of him. "Halcyon is off somewhere planning a coup or take back or SOMETHING. I don't know!" The words that I have needed to spill come rushing forth. I hadn't talked ot Pine about them because she was hurting more than I was. Or the same? We had both lost packs and children. "I can't leave Perun or Idrisa for long. If something were to happen to them too..." A low growl bubbles up as I glance at him, expectancy in my face, as if Elohim will give me the answers to questions I don't even know I have.

shatter the sky; lay waste to the earth