She had been sad with all the deaths… Except sadness was not the term she was looking for. No… She had been depressed. The Arcus Irae were meant to be beings of joy who brought feelings of contentment and serenity to those around them. Only how could she do those things when she did not feel them herself? She had felt acutely the loss of each of her friends, but it went deeper than that. Although feelings of hate could not be known to them without causing them physical pain, she was angry. Zawyne was angry that her friends had died and left her here to feel pain for them while they were at rest. She was angry at the vampires who took her friends away… And she had been angry at the tempests for not saving them. But it went deeper even still, the anger was a parasite, a disease, and it proved to be most virulent, spreading, moving backwards along her memory path to that of her mother, her father. How come they had not been able to tell that Duma was going dark? Were they dead? And if they were… How… Why? Why did they leave her? But Zawyne was mad at herself, though, most of all - after all, she had been the one, at least in her mind, who had planted the seed of the idea into Duma’s mind. She had told him that she didn’t want to be a princess anymore so that she could have her freedom, that she wished she did not have guards. And in some ways? Duma had made that come to pass.

But the blight upon her had been lifted, or at least lessened somewhat by the appearance of Nyla. Zawyne had not known that Nyla was still alive… Although, she had not felt her death, so she supposed that she should have been able to figure it out. At any rate, Zawyne was glad that the remaining rainbows were together, safe within the haven of Dierne Hrof. But she could not shake the feeling of loneliness… despite the presence of her sister. After all, Losa had been busy reuniting with Hurricane. It wasn’t that Zawyne was jealous of her sister – she loved Losa and respected her and wanted to grow up to be her… it was more that she was jealous of Hurricane. After all, he had been stealing away Zaffy’s sister, and at a time when Zawyne needed companionship too. It would have been one thing if she had a close friend other than her sister, but since she had been born, Zawyne had been Losa’s shadow. Though the tiny princess was sweet and charitable, she had not spent much time actually befriending others. And so, the only one she felt she could confide in was Losa. The problem seemed quite obviously enough.

The sunrise sorbet femme was tragically hurt, but where could she go? Who could she tell? She had always been told that she had to be a step above everyone else in order to protect them, support them, and lead them. So she would feel guilty if she put the weight of her depression upon any of the other Arcus Irae – they were dealing with their own grief at the loss of the others and did not need to be made heavier by her own. She had been so upset, that she had not even managed to notice the changes in her own body – her too-large-for-her paws finally fit lithe, thin limbs. Her puppy poofy fur was gone, leaving behind a sleek coat that actually fit her. She noticed none of that… only the pain in her heart. That was why she was here, at the base of an old, gnarled and curled white oak tree, sobbing. The tears stung her eyes and stained dark streams in lines down her face. Her whimpers were soft, but echoed throughout the forest, a morose croon caressing itself way around every trunk and branch. But the echoeing cries were cut short when she heard paw steps approaching her, and she whipped herself around, frantically wiping at her face to clear it of the evidence. She inhaled sharply to catch her breath, but still her lip trembled as her gaze raised to meet that of the lupine approaching her.

⁂Here^I_{am a}Commoner⁂Teen⁂