The argument she and Liland had on the day of her return had left the herd stuck in a tense and bated silence. Uneasy glances pass among them. No one except she and Liland understand the full scope of what transpired that day. Zjeena feels guilty about how the conflict has affected the rest of the herd, but as her hooves pass over these familiar trails, and her mind has time to sort her thoughts, she feels less guilty about everything she did in Paradise, and everything she said to Liland afterwards. The longer she thinks upon her actions and his, and her expectations moving forward, the more sure she is that she's doing the right thing. If their relationship is to move forward, they need to be honest with each other. And if Zjeena is to work through her own emotions, she needs to be honest with herself. Honest words are not always well received, and that's ok. At least now she has no secrets.
The days pass and so does her anger. Zjeena no longer feels so passionately upset with Liland, but neither have they come together to resolve the conflict. There is a chill in the air between the two broken lovers that is not due to the coming of winter. Rumor has it that Liland was depressed during her absence. If rumors are true, the manner of her return has surely not worked to ease his grief, and now Zjeena finds herself in a dark place to match. Broken pieces of her heart ache in ways never felt before. Sleep has come in fits and starts. In nightmares she chases visions of both Liland and Rougaru, and always in the end, she loses sight of both, to awaken alone. She's loved too much only to lose it all.
The only thing that keeps her going is a nagging sense of responsibility. Zjeena doesn't know if she is still lead mare. Some of what Liland said in their argument has her questioning her position, but this doesn't change her will to ensure the herd's safety. The mare lingers near the group, keeping a silent watch.
Zjeena is not oblivious to the arrival of another Fjord. She knows Liland may hold this other mare in high regard for her breeding, just as he had done with her when they first met, and this is just one more torment. Zjeena wonders if Liland plans to replace her with this mare. Is Ylva the reason Liland challenged for the Bay instead of her? Did he have another Fjord mare lined up to replace her? Now that she's returned and their relationship on the rocks, is this still his plan? Not only has she questioned her position within the herd since their argument, but also the truth of their relationship. Was Liland ever in love with her, or was he in love with her breeding?
Ylva's expression, longing for contact, does not go unnoticed. Zjeena continues to graze, hesitant to respond. She wants to dislike the other mare, see her as a rival, but nothing in her face reads of malicious intent. Zjeena can't let her conflict with Liland divide them. They must stand together of they are to survive both the harsh climate of the bay, and the political climate of the islands.
She swallows one final bolus, and lifts her head. She takes the few steps to join Ylva and Rayna. Zjeena carries herself like a leader, and wears a mask of confidence, though her stomach churn with doubt. "Hi, You're Ylva right? I'm Zjeena."